She’s a keeper, too bad you didn’t keep her. // You were my yes, but I was only your maybe.// I hope one day 5 years from now you stumble across me when I’ve grown out of you and finally then after not seeing me for all this time it will break your heart. // You know our love would be tragic.

*falls in love with the attention you give me but not with you*

I’m learning to be okay with the fact that I may never be yours again but I can’t help but hold onto the hope that maybe I will be yours again someday.

- And that’s what makes it hard to let go of the thought of you

I will always believe that you were my worst mistake
But I will say your name in my sleep and wake up screaming thinking you were there
I will still have your name humming in my fucking veins,
Your touch forever on my hands that have now grown cold, just like you,
I will still be able to hear your washed up heartbeat in every beating drum I will hear,
I will still be able to hear that shit we called love in every single place we have been , all those songs, those notes we used to play, over and over

-

Until it was over

That’s the thing with loneliness, it makes us run into the arms of people we know we shouldn’t be with.

 All I could remember was those times when I was with you,
If nothing else from that time, 
I remembered the way you ignored me,
I remember how I used to look at you like I was staring into a washing machine when I was a child,
I found you so interesting to look at, how you worked.
How you could look right through me, why I would keep looking, 
Yet you are still unanswered,
And still an asshole. 

 You are not any kind of person I could want anymore 

 You didn’t deserve how well I treated you,
How long I stayed with you,
How I would stay awake just to speak to you,
You didn’t deserve it 

And I’m going to find someone who does 

 It must be amusing for you,
To think that I am that incredibly naive,
To think that I don’t know,
I don’t notice
Every
Single
Detail 

Oh how I wish that I hadn’t

To think I am blind to your games

You make me feel the best 

But you are the very worst

Wanting you this badly was like waiting for a storm to come

I knew you were going to be destructive

But oh god so beautiful

 Sometimes I wonder,
Why do I even want you so badly?
Then I remember, I remember that you, the first time I saw you, would not even look at me, despite that, I looked at you with her and you looked so happy, so indescribably happy. I looked but did not act, seeing as I would never see you again,but I did see you again , next time with somebody else. After that, with your best friend, that is how I saw you for a number of months with who I thought was your best friend.But turns out,you could leave him so easily that you forgot to speak for an entire week, he waited for you and you did not try, it did not even phase you in the slightest. Then, when he wouldn’t talk to you, you decided that it was time for you to leave. You were a contradiction in it’s highest form. You still spoke to me like you loved me, you promised me you did, more than anybody. It was never a thing. That brings us to today, where there is somebody else who you love more than me, who you are convinced is forever, and it brings me back, to that very first time I saw you 

But worse this time
It’s because I waited G.D

 You never deserved all of the love I gave you 

 I don’t know whether seeing you makes me happy or sad
Because I really love you and when I’m around you I feel nothing that can hurt me
But I know that’ll you’ll always go home with someone else
Again 

A never ending cycle of “I miss you”

 'Almost' is the worst way to love someone. 

They’ll look for you everywhere.
They’ll come back as a ghost
just to find your lips again.

All my friends say
that I have so many stories
like this 

So many stories
of boys saying the wrong things to me
So many complaints of drooling
So many dreamy-eyed stories of them proposing it

I tell them what they want to hear.
My friends. These men.
And still, the silence sticks
to my mouth like a question
I was never really given a choice
to say “no” to.

You will not find the antidote
in the same place you found the poison

I hope you know that every time I tell you to get home safe, stay warm, have a good day, or sleep well what I am really saying is I love you. I love you so damn much that it is starting to steal other words meanings.

"Sometimes I think that my life would be so much easier without you in it, then I see you and remember how much you brighten my world. For now the good still outweighs the bad and that is all that’s keeping me going"

"Be an encourager. The world has plenty of critics already."





- Buy lace underwear and model it around at home. You’re a goddess, own it.
- Realize the fact that if somebody can’t see your virtues doesn’t it mean you don’t have them.
- Pamper yourself. Fill the bathtub with hot water, throw in a bath bomb, jump in, play some music and enjoy. Exfoliate your skin, wash your hair, use a hair mask. Don’t dare to leave the bathroom till you’ve polished every single inch of your body. Try to polish your soul too.
- Remember situations you faced in the past. Realize they’re not a big deal anymore. That bad anxiety you had two months ago suddenly seem so small you might just want to laugh for being so silly, and now it’s over all those tears you cried are the most pointless thing ever. This will happen over and over again, so next time you face a problem remember in a year from now it will be insignificant.
- Go for a walk on your own. Walk aimlessly without a finish line. Come back home when you’re tired, no need to hurry.
- Doodle. Maybe you think you’re doing not so great at living but your watercolors skills are still on point.
- Buy yourself flowers. This one needs no explanation.
- Clean bed sheets are always a good idea.
- Stare at yourself in a mirror after a long nap and admire how glowing, beautiful and dreamy your face looks. Naps work wonders.
- In fact, stare at yourself on a mirror daily. Each time compliment on something. Maybe today you like your hair but don’t enjoy the shape of your lips, but that’s ok because tomorrow you’ll be delighted at how cute your smile is even tho your hair might be a mess. Learn to love you.
- Bake cookies just to eat with your fingers the remaining cookie dough. Everybody knows that’s the best part of baking.
- Forgive yourself."





Sometimes you gotta play the fool, to fool the fool, who thinks they’re fooling you. 

How about coffee, drinks, dinner, a movie; for as long as we both shall live?

She makes quick personal decisions, and laughs so easily.

You can’t rely on beauty to sustain you. What actually sustains us, what is fundamentally beautiful, is compassion for yourself and for those around you. That kind of beauty inflames the heart and enchants the soul

I don’t miss the words that were said. They were probably the worst part.
I don’t miss the silence.
I don’t miss how I took things for granted. I’m paying for that now.
I don’t miss when we’d both feel like we’d failed the other.
I don’t miss the tension.
I don’t miss how fast you’d drive, but it was in your nature. Hell, maybe I miss it just a bit.
I don’t miss the jealousy, on both sides.
I don’t miss how cruel we could be to each other. Although I’m sure deep down that we didn’t mean it. Passion is as destructive as it is beneficial.
I don’t miss all of the times I could have and should have rose to the occasion, or made you feel adequate.
Above all else I just miss you. As much as I may try, I can’t stop thinking about you.