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"you left me here
to paint my heart away,

and drown myself
in the memories,
we

will never share."


it's over.

he is no longer
that boy.


because now,
he is just,
a boy.




so if you have a special someone out there,
call them, message them, ring their doorbell
and let them know
what the meaning of forever is.

you don't know how much it will mean to them.

__________________________
've been doing a lot of thinking.

i want to run,
jump,
scream,
laugh,
cry.


i want
a world where it doesn't matter
what is in your pockets,
because it's already full
of dreams.
but sometimes, art isn't just about
pretty girls and soft light.

it's about emotion and life.
i've lost the spark.
i don't know what to do..

i'm happier, much happier than i've been in the summer, but...
at the same time, i feel more lost then ever.


in those dark times, i had passion and a hunger to create,
to explore, to discover, to learn,
to rid myself of the pain.


and now
i feel
numb

but happy.


how can this be?




i want to take pictures again.
________________________________

the thing is, i don't regret those memories. i've learned from my mistakes and i've grown from them.

and i'm happy to say that now, there is another someone who makes mefeel. this boy is just so sincere, so honest, so real...


i want to make this right.
because this,
this is worth it.



november, be kind.


She told him that she dreamed about escaping. That was all she dreamed about: escape. She saw herself at night running naked down a highway, running across fields, running down riverbeds, always running. And always, just when she was about to get away, he'd be there. He would stop her somehow. He would just appear and stop her. And when she told him these dreams, he believed them.
Take me out tonight
Where there's music and there's people
And they're young and alive

Take me out tonight
Because I want to see people
And I want to see life

In my life
Why do I smile
At people who I'd much rather kick in the eye?
Truth only means something when it’s hard to admit. 


Everyone picks their own poison, you are mine. 



I miss the lights, and seeing your face in the crowd.


memories cause love
love kills
I wonder what you’re thinking
Do you lie awake and do I cross your mind
And could you be waiting for a pretty face to make you come alive
Make me believe that you’re gone
(Before I figure it all out)
I hate the way I’m hanging on
I could ask you to stay
But it’s too late
I don’t need you anymore to fill this space
Now you’re as good as gone
You took it all
I took the fall
And I’ve given up
It’s taken too damn long, for me to write you off
I wonder if I’m dreaming
Or if I’m just sleep walking through the night
And do you believe it
When I’m on my knees screaming I’m alright
So I learn to love the pain
(Cuz It’s all that I can feel)
And I forget you everyday
I could ask you to stay
But it’s too late
I don’t need you anymore to fill this space
Now you’re as good as gone
You took it all
I took the fall
And I’ve given up
It’s taken too damn long, for me to write you off
And when I was fighting to see us through
Baby where were you?
Were you ever here at all…
And if you asked me to stay
I’d walk away
I don’t need you anymore
to fill this space
Now you’re as good as gone
Yeah you took it all
I took the fall
And I’ve given up
It’s taken too damn long, for me to write you off.