“You never realize the holes a person leaves behind until you fall into them.”

I’m so sick of reducing lovers to lessons.

How to let go. How to stay. How to ask for what the heart wants.

I want to share my story, and I want to know yours. I believe with all my heart that sharing our stories, the real, ugly, broken ones, is one of the most powerful things in the world, because to share our story we must first accept it. We must own it. We must stop running from it or shoving it into the corner when company comes over. To share our story is to admit that we’ve been changed.

Communication is everything. Always always tell people exactly how you feel, where you’re at in life, what you need assurance of, what questions you need answered. Communicate everything because anything and everything can be misinterpreted

here’s to all of the people whose names have been lost to time. the unmarked graves, the forgotten memories, the writers of anonymous scribbles on the walls, the ordinary people who made great men great, the people who perhaps did not impact as many lives but who nonetheless made a difference. your stories may never be told, but despite all that, you too are history

me, barely existing: “I’ll take another iced coffee”

I don’t have time to hate anyone, I either love you or I don’t care at all.

i want to be a cafe cat, soft and cozy and surrounded by the smell of coffee beans

but imagine being in your favorite foreign city, living in a cute, cozy apartment with a lovely view, working at a small bookstore, spending your time at beautiful cofffee shops and libraries, taking long walks, meeting new people that make you feel good, being yourself, finding true love and actually feeling good & fullfilled with your life

It’s the season for oat milk iced coffee content


Fall in love with the world around you. Fall in love with the sound of birds, with thunderstorms, with the little flowers that grow against odds in random places. Fall in love with the people and places you can build a home in.

Social media churns the illusion that it’s not enough to live for our own selves, the idea something is only worth doing if it‘s seen

If you spend enough time reading or writing, you find a voice, but you also find certain tastes. You find certain writers who when they write, it makes your own brain voice like a tuning fork, and you just resonate with them. And when that happens, reading those writers … becomes a source of unbelievable joy. It’s like eating candy for the soul. And I sometimes have a hard time understanding how people who don’t have that in their lives make it through the day.

—	David Foster Wallace

Even if it’s a good change, you can’t help but feel like you lost something. Breaking a pattern is uncomfortable and you want Immediate satisfaction. Eventually, the feeling will subside but letting go of who you were is a loss. Taking the first step is hard, but not going back is harder. 

Libraries, archives, and museums all find themselves at the intersection of materiality and the mystical. Perhaps this is why we’re so quiet when we enter them.

—	Jenn Shapland, “Finders Keepers” in Tin House

I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things.

—

Tom Waits

Circumstances do not make the man, 
they reveal him.

—	James Allen

Today was such an eye opening experience. I will never forget it.

1. Drink water
2. Take a break from social media
3. Think of 3 things you’re grateful for
4. Love yourself
5. Read a book
6. Practice self forgiveness 
7. Write down your goals
8. Be honest with yourself
9. Don’t hesitate to tell someone how you feel

1. letting yourself be known is mortifying because you quickly realize how many people truly cannot handle knowing others’ complexity and you start to wonder if you should even try. the answer is yes but it’s still terrifying sometimes, and that’s fine

2. 
   

Never regard study as a duty but as an enviable opportunity to learn to know the liberating influence of beauty in the realm of the spirit for your own personal joy and to the profit of the community to which your later works belong.“

~Albert Einstein

I have a deeply hidden and inarticulate desire for something beyond the daily life.

Start getting into a mindset where you expect something unexpected to happen. Like a sudden shift. An out of the blue miracle. A possibility of an instant breakthrough. Let yourself loosen up about how things will happen. Trust more. Believe more. Be open to receiving.

Disappear for some time, work on yourself, return unrecognizable.

If there is anything left to say, it is this:
I would have found you anywhere.
I will find you anywhere.

— Venetta Octavia, “Orbitals” from Prelude to Light

I think we feel it the most at night because at the end of the day our hearts just want to be home, but our homes aren’t always where we rest our heads.

Physical attraction isn’t enough

if you are seeing this, you are going to prosper. you are experiencing a new part of your life where you will bloom into a better version of yourself and flourish. abundance is coming your way; love is coming your way; peace and clarity are coming your way. you have nothing to fear and even less to worry about. the darkness around you has been the soil and you are now getting ready to sprout. you are going to prosper

art is so beautiful. fashion, music, film, literature. it’s so personal and incredible and i want to dedicate my life to it

Look at the girl in the mirror your goal is to make her happy not to impress others

there is no ‘right time’ there is just time and what you choose to do with it 



the right people hear you differently.

i hate bad jokes until i make them

You’re worth a handwritten letter, a random trip at night to the beach, a painting that says more than a thousand words.

Being direct and upfront about how you feel and what you want will change your entire life

10/10 would recommend

you save other people from being sad but no one saves you

I aspire to be a woman who loves to wakes up early in the morning and loves what she does for a living everyday. Travels often, spiritually secured, and financially stable.

Imagine a wedding in tuscany with big pasta plates, mediterranean music, peonies everywhere and marrying the love of your life you thought you‘d never find, in a long flowing white dress.

lately i have been suffering from a clouded mind. i can’t seem to keep a straight thought while jumping and colliding with one topic to the next. this heavy thinking weighs on me and admittedly, brings me down. but i have to remember to sit down and write what it is exactly that i want out of this life. to write down what i need and how i will be happy in this life. it is daunting to think about all it can take to achieve what you want but i am choosing to focus on what it is that i want exactly - and only that. if i want it badly enough - i will make it happen and i will do everything i can. don’t worry so much on how much work it will be or what can go wrong. focus on you, your happiness, and how great you will feel once it inevitable pans out. 

Gentleness is so important. Gentleness of the heart. Gentleness of the spirit. Gentleness in one’s aura. Gentleness in one’s own motivations and actions. Gentleness that is both embodied and practiced.

What do you create?

What everyone usually does in their spare time. Creating parts of yourself in many forms

What are your hobbies?

Most of my hobbies involve creating something. Or looking for something. Sometimes both.

“Cultivate beauty (aesthetic sense) for yourself and your loved ones. Beauty is not a matter of money and consumption. It resides in all things, primarily in the small details of life.”

Wouldn’t we all look guilty, if someone searched hard enough?”

— Abigail Haas

"Make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservation, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun. If you want to get more out of life, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty."

lay out intentions like paving of ease in future moments. “i’m gonna have fun in class tomorrow”, “when i go for a walk i’m gonna see so many beautiful things”, “i’m gonna have the most cozy night tonight”, “i’m gonna be very present with my friend on wednesday”, etc. see how easily the moment adapts. it’s like a little spell to set yourself up for goodness

I threw myself to the wolves, only to learn the tenderness in their howl, and the loyalty in their blood.

Isra Al-Thibeh

“You have projected onto yourself a world of your own imagination, based on memories, on desires and fears, and you have imprisoned yourself in it. Break the spell and be free.”

No one else cares for your success, so you have to care. You have to force yourself to get up early, you have to force yourself to turn your phone off and revise, you have to force yourself to workout, you have to care for the whole world because no one else cares until they start seeing results. And they won’t ever see your results if you don’t care enough first. It’s your life, they are your goals, your dreams, it will be your success but it has to be your effort and your work first and foremost x

“Most of the time the universe speaks to us very quietly: In pockets of silence; In coincidences; In nature; In forgotten memories; In the shape of clouds; In moments of solitude; In small tugs at our hearts”

— Yumi Sakugawa

when oscar wilde wrote “there are moments when one has to choose between living one’s own life, fully, entirely, completely-or dragging out some false, shallow, degrading existence that the world in its hypocrisy demands” i felt that

“All of us fight hidden, silent battles against not being good enough, not having enough and not belonging enough.”

— Brené Brown

Be passionate. Sure, be passionate when it comes to romance, but be equally passionate in life. Gently grasp it by the hand and run away to the most beautiful places. Who knows where you’ll go from there. Limitless, you have everything you need to get everything you want. The deepest sense of determination and confidence swells your heart and adds that lovely sparkle to your eye. Passion is not a single affair, passion is what you marry. Darling, be passionate about life, because without passion, life simply isn’t worth living.



“I am larger, better than I thought; I did not know I held so much goodness.”





love trying different coffee shops when I’m in a new city

“A woman will return, looking for the girl she was.”

— Louise Glück, from The Complete Poems of L. G.: 1962-2012; “Landscape,”

don’t mess with me fam, i’m a hardcore introvert, i’ve avoided more social events than you’ll ever attend.



accepting your looks and individuality is one of the most important aspects of your life.

Choose to see magic in the little things.

Shimmering light filtering through the leaves. Steam rising from a cup of coffee in the early morning light. The creak of an old windowpane. The smell of a damp forest, after a cool autumn rain.

“Don’t be afraid of the space between your dreams and reality.”

— Belva Davis

When you change, don’t announce it. Just bloom.

people have to realize that

• some people are just more sensitive
• some people don’t think the same way
• some have different reasons in doing things
• it’s not all about you

I don’t like hints. Just come talk to me.

Ladies, please normalize being high maintenance. Keep your standards high, expect people to climb to reach them. Tell them that yes, you do plan on spending your money, your time, and your energy on yourself first. Unabashedly tell people “no” with no explanation. When they ask you “who do you think you are” tell them that you’re you. And that is enough.

1. there’s a lot of unspoken pressure to keep liking the things you used to like and to keep dressing the way you’ve always dressed and to never question what you believe in and basically “be yourself” has slowly morphed into “be what everyone knows you as” but trust me when i say if you just give it up and simply make decisions and take actions based purely on what would make you happy, you’ll gain a very comforting sense of self peace   

me? not studying a language for over a month and then expecting myself to be fluent in it? its more likely than you’d think

did you know that if you mock men for opening their hearts and being emotionally vulnerable, I’ll show up at your house and explain in great detail how disappointed i am in you

cheers to me doing whatever the fuck I wanna do

I will forever love simple, domestic things let’s bake together, go grocery shopping, drive around, just spend time together









No WONDER I have back problems.. I b carrying around this BIG ass heart all mf day

“dogs and angels are not very far apart”

— Charles Bukowski

“All sorts of things in this world behave like mirrors.”

— Jacques Lacan

Passion makes a person stop eating, sleeping, working, feeling at peace. A lot of people are frightened because, when it appears, it demolishes all the old things it finds in its path. No one wants their life thrown into chaos. That is why a lot of people keep that threat under control, and are somehow capable of sustaining a house or a structure that is already rotten. They are the engineers of the superseded. Other people think exactly the opposite: they surrender themselves without a second thought, hoping to find in passion the solutions to all their problems. They make the other person responsible for their happiness and blame them for their possible unhappiness. They are either euphoric because something marvelous has happened or depressed because something unexpected has just ruined everything. Keeping passion at bay or surrendering blindly to it - which of these two attitudes is the least destructive? I don’t know.”

“Be so full of love, it overflows from you like rain. You never know who is living in a desert and is in need of water.”

“When I love I become liquid light”

— Nizar Qabbani, from “When I Love”

I’ve polished this anger and now it’s a knife.

—	Cathy Linh Che,

“The work of the eyes is done. Go now and do the heart-work on the images imprisoned within you.”

— Rainer Maria Rilke 

…Longing, of course,
became its own object, the way
that desire can make anything into a god.

—	Mark Doty, from: “The Death of Antinoüs”

well i used to be attracted to people but now im exclusively attracted to abstract art

Being in her room was like being inside a painting.”

— Lidia Yuknavitch, from “The Chronology of Water: A Memoir,” wr. c. 2011

The curves of your lips rewrite history.

—

Oscar Wilde i’m im paris, i’m drinking an awfully good red wine and i’m reading the secret history so honestly i’ve peaked august isnt even a month its like a long week “Once you have started seeing the beauty of life, ugliness starts disappearing. If you start looking at life with joy, sadness starts disappearing. You cannot have heaven and hell together, you can have only one. It is your choice.” osho no offence but your acidic cynicism, your edgy ‘brutal honesty’, your “god is dead” “people aint shit” “the world is a nasty nasty place so deal with it, sweetie” enlightened nihilism is not enlightenment. it’s cowardice. I want a slightly pretentious partner that wears suits in their free time and seems cold to most other people. They are a well of knowledge, analytical, but I know they’re actually a softie. When they open up, they talk about their childhood pets, favorite teachers and music. Sometimes I wish being a student could be an occupation itself. Like, studying for life could be my career that I actually earn money from. What a dream.

imagine having someone who understands your mind… wow

The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never worshipped anything but himself.

—	Richard Francis Burton

The tree which moves some to tears of joy is in the eyes of others only a green thing which stands in the way.”

— William Blake wrote in his most beautiful letter. “As a man is, so he sees.”

“Nothing is lost, nothing is created, everything is transformed.”

“The bravest thing you could ever do is let someone hurt you and still talk beautiful about them.”

“If I had to give you one piece of advice it would be this: Don’t be intimidated by other peoples’ opinions.”

I stopped sending paragraphs, stopped begging, I stopped telling people how to treat me, and started walking away, blocking, and distancing myself. Life may be lonely, but it’s becoming peaceful. Sometimes being alone in life is better than being surrounded by halfass people.

The bad think can happen, but the next day the sun will come up. And you will eat your toast. And you will drink your tea.
- Rhian Ellis, from After Life 

tell me about how summer fireworks flare up, crackling above the sea

why is there one photo where you and I are together is always blurry?

how does one sms from you become an epigraph?

after long years of humiliation, you clench your jaws in anger so hard that

you can crush diamonds into fine dust

why do we always terribly emote our faked happiness,

as if we ought look happy for everyone else,

whist we are actually being devoid of anything that even slightly resembles love.

small things to add to a hand written letter:

• a teabag of your favourite tea
• heart shaped note with cute drawings
• stickers on the outside of the letter, and inside
• handmade paper doll
• small print or postcard
• a sketch or a little painting or a poem
• glitter or sequins or pearls or buttons
• small candies or bubblegum
• cut out magazine pictures or articles
• folded paper, like origami
• textile like small ribbons or clothing patches
• coins or flat things found in a souvenir shop
• pressed flower or leaf

https://www.etsy.com/listing/564214229/wildflowers-special-edition-floral

Zazwyczaj faceci, z którymi umawiam się na kawę / spacer to graficy albo programiści. To tak samoistnie wychodzi, że dogadujemy się najlepiej. Nie mam nic przeciwko innym zawodom, nie oceniam nikogo przez ten pryzmat, bo if we vibe, we vibe, nawet jeśli ktoś pracuje jako seryjny morderca. Nie no, żartuję,

Muza to osoba, która inspiruje swoim istnieniem i swoim zachowaniem dostarcza danemu artyście pomysłów i energii do stworzenia czegoś nowego.
Wierzę w to, że tym, co odróżnia nas od innych zwierząt, jest to, że potrafimy docenić i tworzyć sztukę. Świadomie.
Szanuję piękno. Staram się doszukiwać go wszędzie - w każdej ulicy, każdym człowieku, każdym
Lubię siebie za to, jaka jestem. Czasami chciałabym być bardziej bezwzględna, rozpychająca się łokciami - na pewno w wielu momentach życia by mi to pomogło, ale...

To, że potrafię cieszyć się z drobnostek (na przykład zawsze szaleńczo cieszy mnie kiedy przy kupowaniu nachosów w meksykańskiej knajpce, panu nałoży się za duża porcja guacamole. Serio, tyle wystarczy, żeby zrobić mi dzień)

Artysta żyje dla swojej muzy - biorąc pod uwagę to, że wszyscy coś tworzymy, wszyscy jesteśmy artystami i powinniśmy.

- prowadzenie dziennika, albo chociaż spisywanie swoich uczuć i przemyśleń bardzo pomaga! z perspektywy czasu wszystko wygląda trochę inaczej, więc warto notować. Notujmy to, co nas inspiruje, martwi albo cieszy.

- brońmy swoich potrzeb i rzeczy, w które wierzymy
- mówmy pewniej o tym czego w życiu chcemy, a czego nie chcemy. W pracy, w związku, wszędzie.
- nauczmy się mówić 'nie', kiedy dana sprawa jest ponad nasze siły, nie leży w naszym interesie, albo wymaga od nas poświęcenia, nie dając niczego w zamian
- przestańmy utrzymywać kontakt z toksycznymi ludźmi, którzy mówią o nas źle albo w jakikolwiek inny sposób sprawiają, że kwestionujemy swoją wartość
- w łagodny, ale asertywny sposób komunikujmy to, czego wymagamy od innych (faceta, przyjaciół), bo inaczej być może nigdy się nie domyślą
- przestańmy czuć się winne za stawianie swojego interesu na pierwszym miejscu i na próbę wygospodarowania w grafiku tygodnia czasu tylko dla siebie (ja mam z tym olbrzyyymi problem)
- róbmy to, o czym marzymy i co serce podpowiada nam jako słuszne dla nas (nawet jeśli to niezgodne z oczekiwaniami babć albo rodziców)
- stajmy w swojej obronie, zamiast biernie potakiwać, kiedy ktoś nas atakuje
- przede wszystkim: starajmy się zrozumieć siebie i ciągle na nowo odkrywać to, kim naprawdę jesteśmy i jakie drzemią w nas potencjały

Bycie muzą szanowanego artysty może być ekscytujące, ale bycie własną muzą daje prawdziwszą moc.