I haven't seen you in a while // As soon as I found myself trying to think of ways to make you want to stay, that’s when I knew I’d already lost you. // We gave up on each other, but for very different reasons. // 7 billion people in this world and i still choose pizza

I have the heart. It’s just always in the wrong place.

Every bad girl has a rule she’s too afraid to break.

Anders | I Wish (You Were Mine)
Is it the chase I love?
I’ve only ideas of you.
And no concept of us.

Money can’t buy you happiness, but it can buy you pizza, which is pretty much the same thing.

Anyone who says that they drink vodka for the taste is either a terrible liar or terribly heartbroken.

When exactly did I lose you?

How do I make you stay when it’s easier to let you go

You want the sad truth?
Even if I forget you,
I’ll always miss you.

To anyone who gets nervous before interviews

I think the first response we always get when we try to tell someone is “Don’t be nervous!”, and of course this is to try to calm us down. But in all honesty, I think the right thing to say is “It’s ok to be nervous. Just try your best not to let them know you are.”
When someone tells me not to be nervous or not to feel a certain way, it’s almost like telling me I’m not supposed to feel that way. And of course, this isn’t their intention, but that’s why I think it’s always important to acknowledge that it’s normal to be nervous in high-stress situations. The key is to do your best to control this feeling to the best of your ability. Do your research, practice your interview questions, dress to impress, and regardless of the outcome, you can say that you tried your best.

project for you all  - Think of someone you haven’t spoken to in a while who’s made a positive impact on your life - someone you wouldn’t be the same without. 
Reach out to them with a simple text, call, email, letter, or any other method you’d prefer. Ask how they’ve been, reminisce, go wherever the conversation takes you. You’ll be glad you did.
I prefer affection in the form of compliments hidden in witty and sarcastic insults.

Don’t ever beg someone to stay. Not because it makes you vulnerable or pathetic, but because there’s a good chance that they’ve already left long before.

I remember having you so close to me until it came to a point where I never wanted to be without you. And it was never out of clinginess or desperation. I just couldn't recall the last time I’d felt at such ease. I never knew I could feel safer. And I never realized how familiar a perfect stranger could be.

I could walk blindly
into a room full of souls,
and I’d still choose yours.

I’ve been stuck on you for so long that I don’t even remember what it feels like to want anyone else.

I rationalize for you like it’s the worst habit I’ve ever developed. I just can’t get myself to believe that the person I carry in such high regards would dare try to put me at such a low point.

You’ve been on my mind for days at a time, and I can’t remember the last time I got this homesick over someone else’s eyes.

Losing you was like breaking a leg while on painkillers. It was the equivalent of being numb, but still unable to walk. And now that the numbness is wearing off, I’m trying not to howl from how it really feels.
I know that broken bones never heal back to the pristine condition they were once in, but once this does, I suppose I’ll have to learn to walk with the limp.

Pretend that I am
summer whispering “Goodbye”,
and let yourself fall.

You know what I find undeniably sexy? Honesty, boldness, consistency, and anything else that people are too afraid to act upon nowadays. All of these things take courage. And what I’ve come to realize is that everyone is afraid of something. So if someone can show me that their desire outweighs their fear, that just might be enough to steal my attention.

Perhaps I’ll come back for you.
When the soldiers in my heart are stronger and the hurricane in your mind is calmer, I’ll stay with you. When my patience is thicker, while your thoughts change quicker, I’ll wait for you. When your imagination finally runs free, I’ll paint the sky with your wildest dreams.
Perhaps after we’ve been apart long enough, time will piece us back together. But darling, right now, I’m in no condition to love after the way you’ve hurt me.

Open me up, and you will discover all of the reasons why I was too afraid to let you in.

If you have to convince yourself that you’re over someone, you’re not.
When you’re over someone, you’ll no longer find their name etched underneath your lips.
Their voice won’t resonate in your ears for hours even when you haven’t heard it in weeks.
You’ll no longer grieve the death of what you once had, or feel like you’re being haunted by their ghost.
If you have to convince yourself that you’re over someone, you’re not.
Because when you know you are, it will feel just as effortless as how it was when you fell for them.

I’d sacrifice days of sleep if it meant that I could fall asleep to the sound of your voice tonight.

Sometimes, under very unfortunate circumstances, distance only makes the heart grow weaker.

Be mine. I’ve already been yours.

Teach me how to not be so soft. Maybe then, I won’t bruise so easily.

I’ve always tried to fathom how bizarre it is when we lose things that were right in front of us a second ago.
But even more so, when that something is an actual person.

I don’t always go to the gym, but when I do…
I still don’t.

You kill an addict when you make them look like the bad guy.
When they come back after saying they couldn’t stay, you refuse to embrace them, because you tell yourself that they won’t stay for long anyway. You run from their open arms and don’t even realize that a part of them died a little more each time you walked away.
You kill an addict when you tell them that you don’t know how to love someone with alcohol-soaked veins and a cocaine heart. You rationalize your distance because they’re there one minute and gone the next, and you don’t know how much your sober heart can take.
You mistake their insanity for apathy, and become desensitized to the sadness in their eyes. You don’t even realize until it’s too late that all they really needed was some peace of mind and clarity.
You kill an addict when you fail to see their efforts because you’re too preoccupied with acknowledging their failures.
You never stop to think that this wasn’t the life they wanted – that perhaps they needed this wall between you two torn down. You never seem to acknowledge that you were the masonry who built this wall in the first place.
You kill an addict by letting them know that you’re fine without them. Meanwhile, they’re secretly gasping for air without you.
Before you know it, years have passed, and you find yourself senselessly apologizing for all the ways you’ve done them wrong. Only this time, you’re talking to their headstone, with grass-stained knees and tearstained cheeks. You cry into your bloodstained hands because you know you’d give anything to hear their cocaine heart beat again.

I guess I haven’t come back to you, because I’m not ready. I’m not ready to know if you’re willing to lose me again.


April 22, 2014
And God knows I’m not dying, but I bleed now.

I would say my manners are the most important part of me,  but to me, that’s something that should be a prerequisite in life. It just blows my mind how many people don’t know what the hell that word means anymore.

only if you assume the story is about you



sleepy voices are the cutest thing ever

The Colourist - Little Games
What did I do so wrong?
You lied and led me on
Was I your hit and run?
Left for dead and now you’re gone

I’m in a long distance relationship with reality


you ruin your life by desensitizing yourself. we are all afraid to say too much, to feel too deeply, to let people know what they mean to us. caring is not synonymous with crazy. expressing to someone how special they are to you will make you vulnerable. there is no denying that. however, that is nothing to be ashamed of. there is something breathtakingly beautiful in the moments of smaller magic that occur when you strip down and are honest with those who are important to you. let that girl know that she inspires you. tell your mother you love her in front of your friends. express, express, express. open yourself up, do not harden yourself to the world, and be bold in who, and how you love. there is courage in that.
Bianca Sparacino How To Ruin Your Life (Without Even Noticing That You Are)

I want to do something with him that’s his first time. I’m going to look in his face when he tries ice cream. Every time he has ice cream for the rest of his life, he’s going to see my fucking face.”
The Place Beyond The Pines (2012) Derek Cianfrance (z ryanem goslingiem! <3 )

There was about her a wildness that flashed in her eyes. She was spoiled and beautiful and easily bored. She was either fiercely excited or cool and detached.

I need science to explain how so much pain can fit inside one person.

I fell in love with your independence, but I hate the fact that you’ve never learned that it’s ok to ask for help. Because even during times when you need it the most, I know you would still refuse it. And I just want you to know it’s ok to need someone. It’s ok to feel like you can’t do something on your own. And it’s ok to not feel ok at all.
I’ve always longed to discover that side of you, and it has nothing to do with wanting to see you in your most vulnerable state. I just don’t know how else to tell you that, when you no longer know how to stand, you can fall into me. It’s my way of saying that this world is so big and my hands may be small, but they will always be big enough to carry what you cannot.

I try to tell myself that it’s just my insomnia keeping me stagnant in pure consciousness.
But it’s you.
When alcohol turns my blood thin and my speech slurred, you’re the only thought that I can articulate clearly.
When I believe that I’d be content with spending the rest of my life alone, you’re the one who changes my mind.
When I could swim across the sea without taking a rest, you’re the one I still forget to breathe around.
When I need a tangible explanation for absolutely everything, you’re the one I can’t ever be logical about.
With these open arms, my heart is yours, and I’ve been so homesick since you shut your doors.
But it’s you.
This is it for me. Because it’s still you.
I’m afraid it always has been.

After you, I no longer wonder how love can drive someone mad.
I understand now when people say that sadness makes silence the loudest noise one can hear.
I worry that my insanity will push me to create a reality I won’t even recognize to be true.
And sometimes, it takes more effort for me to breathe when I lie awake at night than when I’m sprinting down an open road.
Because I hate to admit it, but you’re either in between my thoughts or you are my thought.
And slowly but surely, the image of your smile will begin to fade.
And I may not be able to hear your laugh as loudly as I once did.
But the way you made me feel will haunt me until God knows when.

Life hack: Don’t send texts or emails on emotion.
Better life hack: Don’t have emotions.

June 6, 2013
“Don’t go. Tell me that the lights won’t change. Tell me that you’ll feel the same.”
From my heart to your eyes. 

I’ve never had trouble picking up a pen and pouring my heart out to you, but tonight is different from the rest. Some girls have a profound weakness for poetry and love letters, but it always took an extra effort to spark a nerve in you.
And I’ve always found a thrill in the challenge to move you.
I’ve spent hours lying wide awake in this darkness, only to realize that there’s no beautiful way to describe the way my body aches in this burning silence without you.
There’s no beautiful way to describe the way my lips shudder whenever I try to speak. Because I realize that they may never find any peace and quiet until they find their way back to yours.
There’s no beautiful way to describe how I can’t unlearn the way your body moved along my hands like a glove that was never meant to be taken off in the first place.
There’s no beautiful way to describe how wanting you brings a battlefield of blood to my veins.

there's no beautiful way to describe this

I remember watching a documentary about addiction, and the message was simple: the deeper in someone is, the more love you have to give. The speaker said he would try to make the effort to say these words to the addicts in his life, and it goes: “I love you whether you’re using or you’re not. I love you, whatever state you’re in, and if you need me, I’ll come and sit with you, because I love you and I don’t want you to be alone or to feel alone.”
Maybe that was my sign. Because addicts don’t become addicts overnight. It’s a slow and painful process that slips them way from reality until they no longer wish to go back. Or until everyone around them stops giving them a reason to want to.
And not once did I believe that you valued your life more than the cigarette between your teeth or the drugs in your veins. But what kills me is that I never stopped to wonder why. I was too consumed with the idea that my love should have been enough. If that couldn’t keep you, what could? And how do I help someone who keeps running away? I ask myself these rhetorical questions to hide from the fact that it’s so much more convenient to say you were a lost cause rather than ponder the idea that you could have been saved.






Leather Jacket - Joyce Manor

A loss is a loss – regardless of the magnitude.
At the end of the day, you end up with less than what you started with.
It’s something you can anticipate years in advance and still never be fully prepared for.
And there’s no right way to go about it.
There’s no right way to react when it sends chills down your spine, then proceeds to set you on fire.
There’s no right way to cry when it breaks your skin, and then has the audacity to ask why you’re bleeding.
There’s no right way to calm the searing fever in your head when you know there’s a war going on inside of you.
It can take you out of your own body for days at a time, and make you question if you’re the one who’s really gone.
It will come from outside or within, and tear you apart to find an escape. And all you can do is pick up your pieces and try to keep the rest of what’s left intact.
There’s no step-by-step grieving process for how to fill the void inside of you that has been shoveled out so unexpectedly.
So regardless of if it leaves you feeling empty, relieved, heartbroken, or numb – a loss is a loss.


Actually fuckin’ preach it.


arcosanti by lillian wilkie.




i follow back xxxx

Why yes, yes I did do an entire sheet based on Drake lyrics

@knarlygav did this lil banger and a few others on me today. If you live in NY you need to check out his work bc it&rsquo;s truly rad 🙏🏼 thanks Gav!

I think we lived in perpendicular worlds that were bound to collide, but never settle. You came out of nowhere and crashed into me for a brief, beautiful moment. I held onto you for dear life, because I knew that once that moment passed, you’d be gone for good. And I can’t ever remember letting you go. All I know is that, in the midst of this madness, you were nowhere to be found.

Anonymous asked: What's the most painful kind of love?
The kind that you give and never get back, leaving you unsure of ever being capable of giving it again.

Let me hold you until you can’t recall the last time someone ever let you go.

I’d like to think that I’m not silently waiting on you. But rather preferring to let the time pass at the chance that I might be convenient enough for you again.

I’d like to think that you’ve not quite moved on from me. But rather, that you’ll come to your senses and realize I’ve been weathering through every storm, in hopes that you’d find your way back to me.

Anonymous asked: Is there something on your mind that you really want answered?
Don’t we all?

Sometimes, the very thing that you’re afraid of losing the most is the thing that you’re best without.

I don’t think you realize how dangerous it is to love you the way I do. You could rip me to shreds, and I’d still apologize for the mess I’ve made.

Anyone who thinks that learning something new is difficult has never had to try unlearning something from the past.

If you’re reading this, it’s not too late.

You need to know how badly I want you. At this point, I’m beyond caring if I come off as needy. I don’t care if I come off as weak. I’m already weak at the thought of you laying your hands upon anyone else. I’ve never been one to have a bad temper, but when I picture you sleeping soundly in someone else’s arms, it sets my veins on fire.
I don’t need you to tell me how badly you want me, because chances are, you don’t. I just want you to wake up every morning and remember that there’s someone in this world who refuses to put you anywhere else but first. And I’m sorry if my hands are shaking as I say this to you. I’m just afraid. I’m afraid that your name will still beat within the rhythm of my chest as I’m lying next to someone else. I’m afraid of hearing your favorite song on the radio in the car, and no longer being able to see the road. I’m afraid that everything I have will never be enough if I try to give it to anyone else but you.
Maybe you don’t need to know how badly I want you.
Maybe I just need to know if you could ever want me too.

''I realize that, in this day and age, we’ve made it very difficult to take risks and commit.'' ?

If I was given the chance to go back in time just to meet you all over again, I’m not quite sure if I would. Even at the chance that you would stay, I don’t know if I could risk losing you all over again. I barely survived this one.

It’s simple: I want to dive deep inside of your universe. I want to understand the way your mind works, even if you were never sure in the first place. I want to make you laugh to the point where you’ll never have trouble recalling the last time you did. I want to know what makes your heart beat out of your chest, and why you no longer enjoy sunsets the way you used to. I want to know what makes you tick, what makes you melt, what makes you stay. I can’t imagine being a part of a world that doesn’t align with yours.

'I realize that, in this day and age, we’ve made it very difficult to take risks and commit

There’s this quote I came across that I try to live by as far as relationships, and it goes: “If you hesitate between me and another person, don’t choose me.”
I realize that, in this day and age, we’ve made it very difficult to take risks and commit. But I don’t believe we should tarnish our own standards because of it. If you’re willing to give someone 100%, don’t settle for any less in return.

What you made me feel in a matter of moments, some may never experience throughout their entire lives.

Now and then 🎶

tomorrow might be the best tuesday of ur entire life and i think that is a good thing to remember

What does "saudade" mean?
It does not directly translate into English, but it’s Portuguese for a melancholic feeling of nostalgia/longing for something that you know will probably never happen again.

Meow meow meow



whoaa i made a gif edit lolpassing through a screen door // the wonder years

It’s a really weird feeling to miss someone but know they’re not the same person anymore; the person you miss is essentially no longer existing.

you could take me on a date anywhere and i’d be happy. like it could be the movie theater. or watching a movie at your house. fuck you could take me outside and we could look at clouds or climb trees i do not care as long as we hold hands or something at some point

sleepingwithgohhst asked: Why do you think someone is willing to lose who they are because of a person? Why go through so much pain, even to the point of never feeling anything again?
Because when we get caught in messy situations, we get consumed in our own minds. We don’t get to see what it’s like from a more holistic perspective because we’ve already developed tunnel vision. We are our own harshest critics and sometimes never fully realize how much better we deserve. 
If you’ve ever had to beg someone you love to leave an abusive relationship, or help someone cope with depression because of this deep-rooted sadness within them, you might have a good idea. My best advice is to make an effort to love yourself everyday, no matter how hard it is. Once you do, you’ll no longer find yourself willing to tolerate anyone or anything that jeopardizes your sense of self.

I never mean to come off as jealous or possessive. And so, I’ve been trying to find the least aggressive and selfish way to show you that I just want you all to my damn self.

In the real world, there was no such thing as ‘passively single’. There was no such thing as a slow, monogamous dating. In the real world, you had two clear choices: You were either in the game, or you were out of it. And if you weren’t in the game, you were already losing it.
And so, I did what any other jaded twenty-something would have done: I brought myself up to speed. I downloaded Tinder. And OKCupid. And Snapchat. I started swiping, texting, dating and ‘talking with’ various people at once. I forgot names on first dates. I made notes on my phone to keep track of who was who. After all, it was what everyone else was doing. And it seemed to be the only way to keep up without getting duped.
The longer I stayed in ‘the game,’ the clearer it became to me why other people acted the way they did in relationships. Everyone had, at some point or another, had the exact same experience with dating:
You put all your eggs in one basket – you get burned. So the next time, you make a point to distribute them evenly. You’re so worried about not getting your own heart broken that you don’t really care whose you break along the way.
You date the person you kind of like to distract yourself from the fact that the one you really like hasn’t texted you back in three days. You sleep with people you have no connection with to convince yourself you don’t need anything more. You keep your options open because when one relationship crashes and burns, you need to have somewhere to run. You don’t want to have to feel inadequate, so you keep the back burner full of people to fall back on.
We’re dishonest because we don’t trust each other – because we can’t. No matter how happy we are with somebody and how invested it seems like they are, we never know when the other shoe might drop. We never know who else they’re talking to, who else they’re sleeping with, who they might meet at the bar or online or at work who blows us out of the water and renders us suddenly obsolete. We are constantly at risk of being one-upped and there’s no way to shelter ourselves from it other than to prepare for it. To always have one foot out the door. To never be totally invested or all the way in.
Check any twenty-something’s phone and you’ll generally see a specific smorgasbord of people they’re keeping in touch with – one they want to date, one they want to sleep with and a few others they’re keeping around ‘just in case’ nothing else works out. And do we want all of these people in our lives? Not particularly. In fact, it’s exhausting.
The texting. The dating. The small talk, the drama, the hooking up and breaking up and falling half in love and then having it all fall to pieces. After playing the game for long enough, we all inevitably start to wonder if we’re the only honest player left. Until that scary moment where we check ourselves and realize that, we’re just as bad as all the rest.
We’re dating multiple people at once. We’re taking things too far before we decide how we feel. We’re keeping people around ‘just in case’ and we feel no remorse – because we see these things as necessary measures. We are desensitized to the ways in which we’re using other people, under the guise of ‘Well, that’s just how it works.’ It’s easy to hate the people who’ve flaked on us but it’s harder to admit that we’re a big, consuming part of the problem.

Heidi Priebe Why Good People Ghost: The Rise Of A Dishonest Dating Culture

“If it’s both terrifying and amazing, then you should definitely pursue it.” - Erada
“I become such a monster when I miss you.” - Clementine Von Radics
“And when I asked you how you’d been, I meant I missed you more than I’ve ever missed anything before.” - Iain Thomas
"Hell is loving you in my sleep and waking up alone.”
“If I love you more, will you suffer less?”
“With you, intimacy colors my voice. Even ‘hello’ sounds like ‘come here’.” - Warsan Shire
"If you want to learn what someone fears losing, watch what they photograph.”
"I swear that when our lips touch, I can taste the next 60 years of my life.” - Rudy Francisco
"She puts her hands on either side of my face, and the room falls away. I have never gotten so lost in a kiss before. And then, the space between us explodes. My heart keeps missing beats and my hands cannot bring her close enough to me. I taste her and realize I have been starving.” - Jodi Picoult (I know you said short quotes but this is one of my all time favorites)
(The rest are mine)
“Stop setting yourself on fire for someone who stays to watch you burn.”
"I couldn’t even tell you how many times I’ve wanted to see myself through your eyes. And I often wonder if those butterflies in your stomach are still alive.”
"Every nerve in my body could be damaged or numb, and I’d still be able to feel you.”

I fell in love with you a little too soon and a little too tenderly. I think I’ve hardened myself so much since then, I fear that I’ll bruise anyone who comes too close.

I think I’d still love you even if I knew you were going to hurt me this much.


didn’t even get a text…

Anonymous asked: favorite books?(:
Catcher in the Rye
The Glass Castle
The Night Circus
The Martian
13 Reasons Why
The Trump Card (perfect for people getting into the workforce)
These aren’t books, but TED Talks are my favorite to listen to. They’re almost like short books filled with some of the most insight you’ll get in a matter of minutes. I can make a post with my favorite ones later :)

We broke each other in the most subtle ways. I worked your heart to its core and you tore my walls down with your bare hands.
We bled each other dry. And soon enough, you no longer knew how to love, and I was no longer able to trust.

I did this lil doodle really late last night while obsessively listening to Jamie’s acoustic version of Safe in Your Skin. It’s pretty messy but I like it and I think I’ll turn it into a painting. ily @titlefightfanclub

"A great fire burns within me, but no one stops to warm themselves at it, and passers-by only see a wisp of smoke"

- Vincent van Gogh

It’s important to think about how proud you are of yourself

You should be here.
You should have always been here.

Don’t let temporary circumstances leave you permanently cold.keep your flames alive.

When I call you ‘mine’, please know that it is never out of possession.
I call you mine because your name constantly travels through every wire of my brain. I call you mine because your laugh has made itself at home in my eardrums. I call you mine because your skin occupies every taste bud on my tongue. I call you mine because your name is etched into every corner of my soul. I call you mine because you’re in so much of my heart. I just can’t get myself to think of another name for how you’ve taken over me.

"She was too quiet, or she was too loud. She took things too seriously, or not seriously at all. She was too sensitive, or too cold-hearted. She hated with every fiber of her being, or loved with every piece of her heart. There was no in-between for her. It was either all or nothing. She wanted everything but settled for nothing."

I wanna start doin some Risky Behavior™ because im bored and want to suffer

You were my cup of tea, I drink coffee now.

I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with being alone.
I just can’t help but desire to belong to someone else. Yes, I believe that we are all our own before we are anyone else’s, but whoever you are, I can’t wait for the day when I leap off of the edge of hesitance and fall into you. I can’t wait to clasp my hands around your face and tell you not only how beautiful you are, but how beautiful you make me feel – the kind that I never thought I could be.
I can’t wait to wake up every morning having one more thing to look forward to, or having one more body in my bed. I can’t wait to think about what kind of flowers to buy you the next time I see you, or where we’ll be when I ask you to be mine forever.
I can’t wait for the inevitable arguments we’ll have, where I have to muster the strength I never thought I had to fight for you. And just so you know, I’ve never been one to lose.
I can’t wait to be yours. I’ll make you so glad that you’re mine.

The most subtle form of abuse is when someone tries to invalidate the way they made you feel.

I just want someone to make me feel something again. I don’t care – make my head spin, set my soul on fire, anything. I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this numb.

Anonymous asked: what makes your heart spin?
Pretty girls, beautiful souls, and strong coffee.

If ignorance is bliss, then I’d rather be miserably informed.

They say it takes 21 days before something becomes a habit. So why is it that it only took one glance for me to start thinking about you every single day?

If you remember me, then I don’t care if everyone else forgets.

I’m like hey what’s up hello, see you later because that’s as far as my ability to flirt goes.

Describe your current crush
She’s Italian
And kinda round.
Okay very round.
Some say she’s pretty cheesy.
But she’s also pretty hot.
And fairly popular.
I just described a pizza.
My crush is pizza.

I need to stop saving so much of my heart for you, knowing that you’ll never want it anyway.

Anonymous asked: How can you love someone so much, and them no longer love you back?
You can plant a garden of roses for someone who decides that their favorite flowers are now tulips. You didn’t see it coming and all you know is that you’ve got a hand full of roses with the thorns still intact. Yes it will hurt, and it may even bleed a little. But you eventually have to let go. There’s never a black and white reason for why people fall out of love. I think when we learn to accept that is when we’re able to set that person free.

I was so numb before I met you. It might have been from the empty bottles of whiskey that my dad would drink clean week after week. The alcohol must’ve crawled out of his veins and seeped into my skin.
And I’m sorry for the way I shivered when you told me that you played the piano. It’s just that all I could remember was my 15-year old self trying to fall asleep to my favorite classical piano CD every night to drown out the residual screaming just minutes before.
And whenever we’re about to leave your house, I can feel your eyes on me when I hug your mother goodbye. I know that you find it endearing and probably a little strange. I’ve come to terms with the fact that holding onto her long enough still won’t bring mine back.
I promise you, I’m not broken. But just a forewarning, I might be a little bent. Carrying 50 years of the possible future onto your back until 3 in the morning every night will do that to you.
I was so numb before I met you. And I’m not one to beg, but please bear with me and stay a while. You’re the first thing in a long time that’s ever been able to make me feel anything at all.


July 15, 2013
“Did I hold you too tight? Did I not let enough light in?”

I’ve always been a sucker for dark features and an even darker soul.

If you’re tired of starting over, stop giving up.

You know have idea how deep I’m in for you. We could go two or three days without talking, and I would interrogate myself about what I could have possibly done wrong. I’m still trying to figure out if it’s normal for me to become overwhelmed by this irrational fear that I may never hear from you again.
I try to talk to other people only to realize that I’m pretending that there could be anything between us. It’s the only way I’ve been able to drown out the notion that you want nothing to do with me.
Whenever I make someone else laugh, it almost hurts. Because I realize that all I want to hear is your voice.
And whenever I’m wandering through a crowded room with someone, they always have this tendency to grab onto my hand. It only makes me want to know why you ever let me go.

Girls don’t want boys, girls want high-speed internet and dragons



blaze it, i whisper as i light my homework on fire

You can fight for someone all you want, but as soon as you discover that someone else is fighting for the same person, it becomes war.
And if there’s anything that I’ve learned from
History books, veterans, and the news, it’s that in some way, shape, or form – everyone loses.

I still don’t know if we’re any good for each other. I’ve tried to stay away, but I’m not quite sure if I can. And I know for a fact that I certainly don’t want to. Unless you make the effort to shut me out or disappear off of the face of the earth, which I pray to God that you don’t, I’m not going anywhere.
I’ve tried to let you go, but I keep leading you to the wrong exit. I try to see myself out, and suddenly I forget how to walk.

Connotativewords | jl | We’ll be good for each other soon

Timing is something that none of us can seem to get quite right with relationships. We meet the person of our dreams the month before they leave to go study abroad. We form an incredibly close friendship with an attractive person who is already taken. One relationship ends because our partner isn’t ready to get serious and another ends because they’re getting serious too soon.
“It would be perfect,” We moan to our friends, “If only this were five years from now/eight years sooner/some indistinct time in the future where all our problems would take care of themselves.” Timing seems to be the invariable third party in all of our relationships. And yet we never stop to consider why we let timing play such a drastic role in our lives.
Timing is a bitch, yes. But it’s only a bitch if we let it be. Here’s a simple truth that I think we all need to face up to: the people we meet at the wrong time are actually just the wrong people .
You never meet the right people at the wrong time because the right people are timeless. The right people make you want to throw away the plans you originally had for one and follow them into the hazy, unknown future without a glance backwards. The right people don’t make you hmm and haw about whether or not you want to be with them; you just know. You know that any adventure you had originally planned out for your future isn’t going to be half as incredible as the adventures you could have by their side. That no matter what you thought you wanted before, this is better. Everything is better since they came along.
When you are with the right person, time falls away. You don’t worry about fitting them into your complicated schedule, because they become a part of that schedule. They become the backbone of it. Your happiness becomes your priority and so long as they are contributing to it, you can work around the rest.
The right people don’t stand in the way of the things you once wanted and make you choose them over them. The right people encourage you: To try harder, dream bigger, do better. They bring out the most incredible parts of yourself and make you want to fight harder than ever before. The right people don’t impose limits on your time or your dreams or your abilities. They want to tackle those mountains with you, and they don’t care how much time it takes. With the right person, you have all of the time in the world.
The truth is, when we pass someone up because the timing is wrong, what we are really saying is that we don’t care to spend our time on that person. There will never be a magical time when everything falls into place and fixes all our broken relationships. But there may someday be a person who makes the issue of timing irrelevant.
Because when someone is right for us, we make the time to let them into our lives. And that kind of timing is always right.

Heidi Priebe | The Truth About Meeting Someone At The Wrong Time

I thought I was perfectly content with being numb. But then you smiled at me, and I didn’t realize until then how much I needed to be set on fire.

Muses are like wild animals – beautiful and mysterious, but deadly if you get too close.

Project for you all:

Think of someone you love. Give them a call, tell them you were thinking about them, and most importantly, that you love them.
You’ll be glad that you did.

You made ‘temporary’ feel like 'forever’.

I’m a book on your shelf, and I give you permission to open me up. Turn my pages, make creases into me, and mark the parts that you don’t ever want to forget. I want you to read the chapters that I’ve told others I ripped out. Because rarely have I ever let anyone read me from cover to cover. But for now, I just want to be yours to know.

You’ve been on my mind for days at a time, and I can’t remember the last time I got this homesick over someone else’s eyes.
You’re feeding me poison, and I’m overdosing on your laugh as if it’s the only thing that’s been able to save me.
My heart is like a shiny object with jagged edges, and yet you were the first person who couldn’t resist holding it with your bare hands, even if it meant that you were the one who might bleed.
Now, whenever I wake up, I feel the devil sitting on my chest as soon as I realize I’ve awoken to another day without you.
All I know is – whiskey doesn’t burn nearly as much since I lost you.

A sense of humor, a contagious laugh, the ability to laugh at herself, faithfulness, intellect, street smarts, odd talents, wit, modesty, compassion, open-mindedness, manners, knowing how to pick and choose her battles, resilience, humbleness, corkiness, clumsiness, endurance, drive, optimism, sincerity, generosity, a huge appetite to engulf herself in art, science, sports, or anything along those lines, making a constant effort to improve, treating her family/friends well, being nice to children and animals (haha yes this is important), not knowing how beautiful she is (so someone like me can make excuses to remind her).

Anonymous asked: How can boys be so cruel?
Cruelty has no gender. Unfortunately, that’s something we’re all capable of.

I can never fully explain why, but there’s just something undeniably raw about loving someone who’s been wounded before. You know that this person isn’t just a survivor, but they must have licked themselves clean and gotten back up after life decided to give them a beating or two.
There’s something undeniably brave about someone who doesn’t hide their scars, but instead, displays them with triumph and audacity. Once this is recognized, the shamelessness alone could keep any bystander either fearful or madly in love.
There’s something undeniably sacred about holding someone who’s been wounded before. Because they’ll do their best not to bleed on you, and a part of you knows they don’t even need to be held.
In fact, it’s almost as if you need it more than they do.

Connotativewords | jl | Falling in love with wounded resilience

 for when the one you loved most turned into the one you hated most

What seems like a reasonable distance to one person may feel too far to somebody else."

I am so deeply attracted to your mind, heart, and soul. Your body is simply a gateway for me to express my appreciation for the parts of you that I will never be able to physically embrace.

I like someone who is a little crazy, but coming from a good place. I think scars are sexy because it means you made a mistake that led to a mess.

If we’re together, be prepared for me to:

  • Write you notes all the time
  • Let you wear my clothes
  • Probably steal your clothes
  • Make your parents love me
  • Make you laugh constantly
  • Try to turn you on when you’re mad at me
  • Hold your hand while I drive
  • Hold your hand while you drive
    • Unless you need both hands on the wheel
      • Then I’ll just put my hand on your leg
  • Learn how to cook your favorite meals
  • Learn how to play your favorite song on the guitar
    • And make someone else sing it because I can’t
  • Take candids of you all the time
  • Shower you with compliments
    • Especially on days when you don’t feel beautiful
  • Encourage you like it’s my job
  • Support you like I was your biggest fan
  • Want you more than anything else
  • Love you like it’s the only thing I’ve ever done right

Why would fate
bring us together
if it knew that I wasn’t meant
to fall in love with you?
Doesn’t God know
that I just don’t have
that kind of


My body literally aches at the thought of never seeing you again.

The minute you see all the things you have, you see all the things that you stand to lose.

I could never say we were just friends.
Not by the way you set alarms off
in every sleeping nerve in my body.
Not by the way your body
became a temple for my eyes.
Not by the way I’d suffocate at the idea
of you belonging to someone else.
Not by the way bloodbaths
would rush through my veins
because my heart couldn’t tame itself.
I could never say we were just friends.
Because in the end, ‘just’ means ‘only’.
And you were never only anything –
you were everything.

You’re a constellation.
And I’m just a star
that can’t even fathom
how lucky I am
to be in your universe.

Even if you called 6 months later, at 3am I’d still answer

"How do you go back to being strangers with someone who has seen your soul?"

Everyone is addicted to something – or someone.

We only obsess over relationships that feel unfinished."

Anonymous asked: How do you ask for a second chance with someone?
If you truly believe that you deserve one, you’ll find a way.

Playlist for y'all. Enjoy

"Surely if we knew what bitterness fate held in store, we would shrink back in fear and let the cup of life pass us by untasted."

It’s terrifying – the way you make me feel, even when I was certain that I no longer could.

15 Things Ambitious Girls Do A Little Bit Differently When They’re Dating
1. Their relationship will not take up 100% of their life, but they will put 100% into their relationship. It’s important to ambitious girls to have other priorities and things going on outside of their relationship. But that doesn’t mean they won’t give it their all when it comes to being happy with someone.
2. They’re not looking for a challenge, but they are looking for someone to challenge them. They’re not interested in the chase or winning the game. But they’re interested in being with someone who’s going to challenge them to be better and to grow every day.
3. Romance usually means something different to ambitious girls. They love dates and surprises just like the next girl. But in their minds, the most romantic thing in the world is being with someone who they can truly relate to, and someone who supports them in everything that they do.
4. They’re not afraid to tell you when they like you. If they think this thing has a chance, they’re not going to sit back and play coy and always wait for you to make the first move. They’re going to be straight-up with you, and you can do with that what you want.
5. They don’t play games. There’s no “wait two hours to text back” guidelines that they believe they have to follow. Ambitious girls do what they want when they want, because they don’t have time for arbitrary dating rules.
6. They’ll still have a lot of other things going on besides you. They take dating seriously. But they’re also passionate about their careers and friends and family and hobbies. When they’re dating, ambitious girls are looking for someone who’s not only going to support that, but someone who’s going to love them all the more for it.
7. They don’t hold it against you if you’re not interested. They know what they want, and if you’re not interested, they’re just happy that you’re not wasting any more of their time.
8. They’re not looking to be a trophy wife. The idea of playing backseat to their companion is nauseating to an ambitious girl. They’re looking for someone who is going to be their partner, not their leader.
9. Ambitious girls know that being tough and being emotional aren’t mutually exclusive. Ambitious girls are strong, confident, and intelligent. They know how to handle themselves. But they’re aware that that doesn’t mean they can’t be vulnerable or emotional. One of the reasons they feel comfortable dating is because they know how to be tough without feeling the need to apologize for having emotions.
10. A good conversation in their eyes doesn’t revolve around how much money you make or how successful you are. They’re more interested in hearing what makes you tick, what inspires you, what gets your blood flowing, and what you’re passionate about.
11. They know that sometimes they have a hard time opening up in the beginning. They’re used to being in control, so when they’re not, it’s a little disorienting. But they enjoy the challenge of trying to get better, so it’s something they’re always keen to work on.
12. They won’t ask you to choose between them and your other priorities, because they’re too busy having priorities of their own.
13. Ambitious girls are attracted to people who have goals and aspirations – people who want more than an average existence. They don’t need you to be the CEO of a Fortune 500 or an insanely successful entrepreneur. They just want to know you care about something that matters and are willing to work for it.
14. They’re not going to wait forever. They’ll let you know, one way or another, that they like you. They’re never in a rush to jump into a relationship, but they’re also practical about where they are in their lives and when it’s time to move on. If you like them, do something about it.
15. They’re less worried about a fairytale romance and more concerned with finding someone who will simply make them happy. They’re not preoccupied with a huge diamond ring, an over-the-top wedding, and a ridiculous love story they can tell their friends. They just want to be with someone who will love them for who they are, and never ask them to stop following their dreams.

Anonymous asked: Is there such a thing as unconditional love?
Is there such a thing as Nutella?

I used to believe
all addictions had an end,
until I met you.

Writers are interesting creatures. We will express ourselves in fluidity, poetry, satire, puns, length, depth – the list goes on.
But one thing writers seldom admit is how draining it is to be able to articulate whatever it is that makes us feel the way we do, or become the people we are.
It’s always a quiet battle between the writer and their mind. Sometimes it’s a clean break. Other times, it’s a bloodbath.
Writers will seldom admit how painful it is, because we don’t want sympathy for bleeding onto a piece of paper. Sometimes, it’s the only way we can express ourselves properly, regardless of the cost.
Writers seldom admit any of this out loud. And yet, it somehow always manifests in the loudest silence we will ever hear.

I waste too much time wishing I was important enough for people who really don’t deserve it anyway.

Everyone else
who has come
into my life
was just
another excuse
for me
to miss you
even more.

I yearn to master the art of being unforgettable.

WCW goes out to this beautyyy

You invited yourself into my thoughts, as I held the door open for you, and you wanted to know how I’ve been. You asked if I still give you the time of day since you left. And quite honestly, I’ve tried my best to keep myself too busy to think about you.
It feels like I’ve been aimlessly driving a car at full speed, but the moment I see you, I hit a wall.
And I’m caught in that moment where I’ve just crashed, and everything is happening in slow motion. I’m caught in that moment with this sharp pain in my chest.
I can’t get out, and I’m not sure if I’ll survive.

This is what thinking about you does to me.

I’d like to think that I’m not silently waiting on you. But rather preferring to let the time pass at the chance that I might be convenient enough for you again.

You do something to me that I can’t explain. So would I be out of line if I said “I miss you”?

If you really do care, you have the cruelest way of showing it.

I realize why I haven’t been able
to stop writing about you.
It’s very similar to how the human body
reacts when deadly pathogens
make their way into its veins.
It will either do everything in its power
to rid itself of those toxins,
or die trying.
And sadly, that is exactly
what I intend to do.

The feeling of missing you is the slowest, most painful poison I know. It’s the kind that escapes from my heart and swims through my veins. And it corrodes my bones, making me weaker than I’ve ever been for you.

To anyone who has had the privilege of seeing you today:

They have absolutely no idea how lucky they are.

It’s hard to be friends
with someone you once wanted
more than anything.(about self control)

After all this time,
you haven’t left my mind.
And it gets to the point
where I’d rather not forget about you.
Yes, you were always my friend.
No, you were never mine.
But it’s the unshakeable fact
that you insist on leaving marks
underneath my skin,
and your picture hanging
on the wall of my mind,
that only makes it logical why
I still haven’t found the vigor
to let you go.

I think what happens when I miss someone, is that I don’t necessarily miss the person. I miss the assurance of knowing that at least one person in this world might think of me right when they wake up or before they fall asleep. I miss shamelessly spewing out how beautiful I think a person is without sounding pretentious or obsessive. I miss being overly affectionate without it being intoxicated or unorthodox. I miss knowing that this person’s main source of laughter was my unspoken responsibility. I miss the subtle hostility that a person shows at the thought of someone else trying to gain my attention, especially when they claim they’re not the jealous type in the first place.

It’s the most exhausting feeling – having the potential to love you, and suppressing it at your convenience, because I know it will never be returned.

what do you mean it’s not socially acceptable to drink a glass of red wine during midday before the gym

And when I asked you how you’d been, I meant I missed you more than I’ve ever missed anything before.

You’re not damaged just because you’re not interested in a good person who’s interested in you.

Do you miss anyone?
Sadly, always.

I know it’s selfish –
wishing you were wide awake
thinking of me too.

I thought you should know
that ever since I first saw you,
I don’t see anyone else anymore.
And it terrifies me,
because when I look at you,
the only question
that rings through my head
is ‘Do you see me too?’

Anonymous asked: I had someone, but never his attention. If you find someone, make sure they want both.
↑↑↑ Realest thing ever ↑↑↑

I need to realize
that I’m only in love with
who you use to be.

Time goes by so much
slower when I remember
how much I miss you

It makes me happy that you exist.

You make everything better than it’s supposed to be. That’s why the thought of losing you is so terrifying to me.

They say that everything is temporary, but I beg to differ. Because this feeling you’ve left in my chest – I don’t see it subsiding anytime soon, or at all for that matter.

I don’t breathe easily knowing you might be just fine without me.

I can’t think of
a more exhausting feeling
than looking for
any excuse in the world
to talk to you,
while seeking
every bit of willpower
not to.



I hope one day 5 years from now you stumble across me when I’ve grown out of you and finally then after not seeing me for all this time it will break your heart."

I hope one day 5 years from now you stumble across me when I’ve grown out of you and finally then after not seeing me for all this time it will break your heart."

Billions of stars couldn’t outshine you.

If you asked me to define what we had, I wouldn’t know where to begin. All I know is that I want to keep you here as long as I possibly can. And I won’t beg you to stay, because I think that would be desperately selfish. When you care enough about someone, you want their happiness before your own. But all I can say is that I will do my best to make sure that you’re at your happiest with me.
It’s not a clear definition, but it’s the best I’ve got right now. 

Ayy let&rsquo;s all wish this beautiful girl an amazing birthday!! Love ya girl!

For you, my heart will
be just as undivided
as my attention.

I fell in love with him. But I don’t just stay with him by default as if there’s no one else available to me. I stay with him because I choose to, every day that I wake up, every day that we fight or lie to each other or disappoint each other. I choose him over and over again, and he chooses me
Tris on Four in Allegiant by Veronica Roth 

Is that what you wanted? That I be gone for good, rather than just mad for a little while?

If I were the world’s biggest pathological liar, and I was only to speak one statement of truth, it would be that I have never experienced anything as beautiful as you.

You light a fire inside of me that would make even the sun envious.

I don’t mean to beg,
because by the way I’ve been
pleading you to stay,
people would think
that I was homeless.
And they’re right.

I sympathize
for every single person
who has ever
taken you for granted,
left you for another,
cheated on you,
belittled you,
broke your heart,
or made you feel
any less than human.
Because one day,
they will realize
that they lost
the most important part
of themselves when
they let you go.

Remember the time you actually liked me back?
Yeah me neither.

I need to find my muse.

I want to be able to write about someone again.

It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even drink to try to forget your name anymore. I drink to forget mine.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the way I was willing to fight for you.

I don’t need ‘perfect’.
Whatever I have with you
is more than enough.

I keep hoping that you’ll choose me, despite the fact that I know I was never an option to begin with.

With time, I’ve realized just how much you and the ocean have in common. Breathtaking on the surface. A mysteriously endless depth underneath. Indescribably beautiful, and just as dangerous. The stronger I feel towards you, the more powerful your currents become. And soon enough, you’ve pulled me in.

I’ve always been the type of person who needed a sense of direction. But I’d gladly throw away my map if it meant I could get lost in you.

If I looked up the definition of ‘devil’,
I would probably find your name.
If someone were to ask me
to describe what hell felt like,
I would talk about what you put me through.
If I wanted to feel intoxicated,
I would drink in the sound of your voice.
If you wanted to know the color of my mood,
I would let you peak inside my chest.
If you wanted to go on an adventure,
you could take a ride on the roller coaster in my veins
that goes off every time you do as little as look my way.
If you wanted to know how much I loved you,
I would take you to the beach
and tell you to look for the end of the ocean.
If you needed a place to stay,
I would still let you crawl under my skin and make yourself at home.

When you walked away, I wish I’d know at the time that it would be your loss, not mine.

I don’t think you realize how dangerous it is to love you the way I do. You could rip me to shreds, and I’d still apologize for the mess I’ve made.

I just want someone to make me feel something again. I don’t care – make my head spin, set my soul on fire, anything. I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this numb.

122 days later,
I look back and put
all of the pieces together.
I can still remember
the exact moment
that I lost you.
Even when we kissed,
I swear I knew
that would be the last time
by the bitter taste
you left in my mouth.

Just remember – you’re not only writing to tell a story. You’re writing to create an experience.

You have no idea
how difficult it is
to actually speak
the exact same words
that I’ve already told you
a million times
in my head

It feels as though the only way I’ve been able to mend my ability to write is by having someone else break my heart.

i always stay up way too late and feel like shit the next day and you think i’d know better by now but…

You want the sad truth?
Even if I forget you,
I’ll always miss you.

what are standards at this point, just make me laugh and don’t be a jerk

What can I do to make you stay?
The answer is: nothing.
Other than by force, nothing I do could ever make you stay. In fact, the door will always be wide open for you if you decide to leave.
Instead, I will do everything I possibly can to keep you from wanting to ever walk out of it.
I won’t waste more than a few minutes in the day telling you how beautiful you are. Rather, I’ll spend every waking and unconscious moment making sure you feel it.
I won’t ever leave you in question of how I feel about you, because I’ll sneak handwritten notes into your bag every time we part ways, letting you know how much I already miss you.
I won’t treat you like a prize that I’ve already won, but rather like a flame that has been sparked by my last match.
So, yes. I am more than aware that nothing I say or do could ever make you stay. But God, I hope you choose to.

It’s not that I’ve fully gotten over you. It’s just that, for a moment, I forgot how much I missed you.


I’d like to share a word that I invented - Cyranosis. Some of you may recognize the name from the French play, ‘Cyrano de Bergerac’. Well, that’s exactly where it came from.
Cyrano, a witty and not-so-attractive man, was in love with a woman, Roxane, who had been infatuated by a handsome fellow, Christian. Cyrano, despite his love for her, helps Christian recite beautiful words to Roxane below her balcony and essentially, she falls in love with him. Years pass by, a war breaks out, and just before the brink of Christian’s death, Roxane admits to Cyrano that she would fall in love with a man who spoke words as beautiful as Christian even if he were ugly. Years later, at the face of Cyrano’s own death, Roxane finally discovers that the words coming out of Christian’s mouth belonged to Cyrano all along. His head resting on her lap, she professes her love to him. All this time, it was Cyrano who she loved, simply because of his words.
I wondered why a term like this did not exist yet, and then I realized that it’s because a love like this is nearly impossible to accomplish. 
(or maybe there is one that I’m not aware of)

Thank you so much @knarlygav 😍😍

 come back to me - toki lo


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