If you leave, please stay gone.// Courage requires only one moment, whereas regret will last a lifetime. // Sometimes, the best way to stay close to the one you love, is to be just a friend.

So little of what could happen does happen.

1) You’re empowering.
2) I like your voice.
3) You’re strong.
4) I think your ideas/beliefs matter.
5) I’m so happy you exist.
6) More people should be listening to what you have to say.
7) You’re a very warm hearted person.
8) It’s nice seeing such kindness.
9) You’re very down to earth.
10) You have a beautiful soul.
11) You inspire me to become a better person.
12) Our conversations bring me a lot of joy.
13) It’s good to see someone care so much.
14) You’re so understanding.
15) You matter a lot to me.
16) You’re important even if you don’t think so.
17) You’re intelligent.
18) Your passion is contagious.
19) Your confidence is refreshing.
20) You restore my faith in humanity.
21) You’re great at being creative.
22) You’re so talented at ____.
23) I don’t get tired of you the way I get tired of other people.
24) You have great taste in ___.
25) I’m happy I stayed alive long enough to meet you.
26) I wish more people were like you.
27) You’re so good at loving people.

Nobody looks at a person upon meeting them for the very first time and thinks: this is the one I’m going to 
Spend late nights dreaming about,
The one that’s going to make me giggle like an idiot,
Tuck my hair behind my ear,
Braid their legs between mine,
Leave a scorching trail of honeyed kisses between my thighs,
Nobody thinks that this is the one that’s going to rip my heart to shreds and parade around town with it,
Wear it like a badge of honor.
You were a stone cold fox,
The lullaby that seeped into the pit of my stomach,
Churned within my core,
rushed up and spilled from my lips.
You entwined with nerves,
Played lute music with the strands of my veins .
You were the bird that lodged itself in my throat,
spread like cancer to my lungs,
Feathers nestled between the ridges of my spine,
Wings fluttered across the playgrounds in my membrane.
I am Spanish moss, blooming wildly across the forests of your chest.
I wanted you to remember the scent of my hair snarled against your nostrils,
Remember melting into me, sweat intermingling in a flowered remedy.
I used to pluck fruit off of the lemon trees that sprouted from my fingertips,
Hid ivy in the cracks of your bones,
Tied guava leaves around your
wrists,
I’d even hang you on a nook in my closet.
For you were another notch on my list of forget-me-nots,
A left over fingernail that’s still lodged between the blades of my shoulders.

Time has a wonderful way to show us what really matters

If you are not getting the attention you deserve, leave.

If you are giving a lot more than taking all the time, leave.

If you are second choice, leave.

If you are being cheated, leave. 

If you aren’t being treated right, leave.

If it brings you more sadness than happiness, leave.

If you are being abused in any type of way, leave.

Most people don’t realize they deserve and are able to get so much better. 

Believing even in the possibility of a happy ending is a very powerful thing.

"The truth is,

some pain just isn’t worth it.

Sometimes, the hurt gets old.

Sometimes, you get tired of 

being the one who has to heal."

"I feel desperate when it comes to you. Desperate and a little bit insane. All I can think about around you is what you taste like."

HAVING A CRUSH SUCKS LIKE I MIGHT AS WELL HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH A KITCHEN APPLIANCE

"I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations."

"Good people are like candles; they burn themselves up to give others light"


Are we dating?
Are we fucking?
Are we best friends?
Are we something in between that?

"How to kill someone;
Hold their hand and then never touch their skin again,
See them nearly everyday and pretend they don’t exist,
Act like everything you ever said to them was a lie."

I loved the bad in you before your perfection

If only our old phones kept their voices, and their stories, and their details, and their laughs, and their promises, and the dreams we shared in the nights, like a delicious bread.

Respect your hearts and don’t throw them into dirty stories.

Getting used to your absence is hard,
And getting used to your presence is even harder.

They say, tongues don’t have bones. Weird,
If we look at all the hearts that they break.

And the writing is still : to you, with you, about you, because of you and for you.

There are women who can steal your mind with just a word,
And others who can steal your heart with just a smile,
And others who can steal your soul with just a look,
But there is one woman, who can steal all of your mind and heart and soul,
without doing anything.

I start every day with lie,
That I will forget you,
And that yesterday was the last day of your love,
And that the earth is full of others like you,
But as soon as the sun rises,
I get lost intentionnaly so I can meet you,
Every day I tear apart all your letters,
And any souvenir of you,
And burn a lock of your braids,
And say that I will leave you,
And I won’t look at you if I meet you,
But as soon as the day begins,
I grab my pen again and write to you.

And between each love story, I love you.

Loss, is when you’re waiting for something that will never come back, and have dreams that don’t belong to you, and a name which became forbidden for you to call “companion” or “my love” or even “my friend”.

I loved you by force, not because you’re the prettiest, but because you’re the deepest, because who he loves beauty is generally a fool.

You’re neither far so I can wait for you,
Nor close so I can meet you.
You’re neither mine, so my heart can rest,
Nor forbidden for me so I can forget you.

Some disappointments don’t burn or hurt, they just tell you that you’re stupid for the thousandth time.

And is there anything harder than burrying your own heart with your very hands?

There are those who say good morning, and there are those who actually prove that it is a good morning.

Real death is when I know that you’re the other half that I only live with. And that you know that I’m the only half that completes you. And then say goodbye and go our separate ways.

We prefer to keep some wounds to ourselves, not because they’re embarassing, but because they’re dear to us like the people who caused them.

I know that if I shot a thousand bullets at you, you wouldn’t feel, and wouldn’t bleed, and wouldn’t suffer, and wouldn’t die. Because bullets, sir, don’t kill a dead man.

And you were in my eyes a beautiful dream. Then I woke up, and if only I didn’t.

The problem with great love stories is that they start in a beautiful way, and end in grief.

Love is tasteless, if it’s not bitter.

You know what, darling, I want to communicate with you, far from those social networks, far from Facebook message’s and those ambiguous comments, far from I Like and I Don’t Like, far from those high definition pictures and fake colours.

Far from Whatsapp, and Viber, and Tango, and Instagram, and Twitter.

I want to communicate with you in a civilized way, yes, like having a cup of coffee together.

I do know that there are people more beautiful than you, but I looked at you with my heart before my eyes.

We’re not far, but we are not getting closer.

I love you.

But how much from my life is there left to me to love you with?
And how many nights is there left to me to dream about you?

How many years should I be screaming so you can hear me call for you?
And how many years should I be crying so you can realize the amount of my pain?
And how many years should I bleed so you can realise the depth of my wound?

How many knights should I love so I can forget you?
And how many love stories should I live so I can forget you?
And how many personnalities should I adopt so I can forget you?

And how many times should I agonize, die and be burried so I can forget you?

There is always someone out there who loves you and thinks about you. But the problem is that he stays there and doesn’t come here.

Before love, things are said.
And while in love, things are said.
And after love, things are said.

And there are differences between before, while and after.

I miss you and I miss your voice very much. And I’ve never hated something in my life, like I hate when the phone show the caller’s number.

Don’t promise me, so you don’t betray me and I don’t betray you.

You, everytime I remember you I miss you, and everytime I miss you I cry you, and everytime I cry you I close my eyes, and everytime I close my eyes I see clearly, as if you were something only clear in the dark.

Till now, I’m still trying to convince myself everytime I look for you and can’t find you,
That you’re playing hide and seek with me,
Then I look for you in places that you’d never imagine,
I look for you behind the curtains, behind the door,
And under the table, and between the folds of the books,

I look for you in the boxes, and in the closed cans and in the wardrobes.

Destroying someone can take a minute, liking them can take an hour and loving them can take days.

But forgetting someone can take a whole lifetime.

Sometimes, the best days in life turn to a bunch of texts in an old phone, or a pile of papers in a old neglected dresser drawer.

When you miss someone, get away from your phone. Because you will send them something you will regret after.

Give me my freedom, set me free from you.

Because I loved you very much,
To the point where I thought you were the only man on this earth.
To the point where I believed that if you were absent, I was absent too.
To the point where I thought about giving you the whole universe for your birthday.
To the point where I was shivering with fear when I thought about parting.
To the point where I waited a lifetime for the rise of your sun on my world.
To the point where I will consume a lot of my time and my health, in order to grasp the idea of your depature.

The best kind of love is the one that we find when we’re looking for something else.

The most painful tears are those of the people who were always strong.

Between what we feel and what we say, a missing part.

If you want to lose someone, give them everything

There is the one who loves you, and there is the one who got used to you. The difference is that if you’re gone, the first will miss you and ask about you, and the second will forget you as if he never knew you.

What kills me in you is that you never mention me, and what kills me in myself is that I never forget you.

You, who is bigger than words,
How great are the distances between me and you,
But when I can you, you hear me,
And when I talk to you, you hear me,
And when I cry you, you hear me,
And still nobody understands me but you,
And still nobody gets me but you,

And still nobody defeats me but you.

The excuse is a lie, the promise isn’t kept, and the victim was the honest one.

To forget someone you loved for years, doesn’t mean that you’ve erased them from your memory. You just changed their place in your memory. Not in the facade anymore, present everyday with all their details.

Maintaining a dead relationship is like watering a tree that has dryed out. It cant fruit anymore, even if you water it with your blood.

Did I ever tell you that your voice and cold weather have something in common?

Because both make me shiver.

You’re the wrong person with who I lived my right love story, and I am the right person who entered your life by mistake. 

Days will pass, and you’ll abandon things you were addicted to, and leave someone, and cancel a dream, and finally, accept a reality.

Don’t love deeply, till you make sure that the other part loves you with the same depth, because the depth of your love today, is the depth of your wound tomorrow.

In order to not die twice, don’t go back to who betrayed you.

If they ask you about me, tell them “She was the only girl who loved me with honesty, and I broke her.”.

Some create excuses to leave, while some create illusions to stay.

How many “How are you?” were in fact “I miss you!” but they didn’t understand it.

Some are like the Moon, good looking, but only when they’re away from you.

Life doesn’t stop after losing someone, but it goes on without them differently.

Nothing lasts forever." A saying that we all believe in, but still get hurt by endings.

The most dangerous heart disease : strong memory.

Don’t wait for someone to come back, but wait for someone new to appear.

In love, things oppose each other : we want and we don’t, we hope and we fear, we seek and we flee.

In order to let the beautiful be beautiful, don’t get close to it too much.

Trusting someone is giving them your back and a knife, and letting them chose : stabbing you or protecting you.

And I fear that my place gets taken by some other one, very lucky and not too shy, who flirts with your eyes while I’m the one who’s crazy about them.

Trust me, I didn’t need this kind of separation to realize your value to me.
Because I didn’t need this suffocation, to realize that you were my breath.
I didn’t need this cold, to realize that you were my warmth.
I didn’t need this breaking, to realize that you were my back.
I didn’t need this weakness, to realize that you were my power.
I didn’t need this sadness, to realize that you were my happiness.
I didn’t need this stun, to realize that you were my mind.
I didn’t need this delirium, to realize that you were my memory.
I didn’t need this coma, to realize that you were consciousness.
I didn’t need this fall, to realize that you were my wings.
I didn’t need this bottom, to realize that you were my top.
I didn’t need this mud, to realize that you were my purity.
I didn’t need this fear, to realize that you were my security.
I didn’t need this silence, to realize that you were my voice.
I didn’t need this darkness, to realize that you were my eyes.
I didn’t need this failure, to realize that you were my success.
I didn’t need this waiting, to realize that you were my station.
I didn’t need this end, to realize that you were my conclusion.
I didn’t need this wake, to realize that you were my sleep.
I didn’t need this tranquilizer, to realize that you were my tranquility.
I didn’t need this dispersion, to realize that you were my stability.
I didn’t need this alienation, to realize that you were my country.
I didn’t need this death, to realize that you were my soul.

One of the most severe situations of a woman’s heart is when someone leaves her as a lover, and then comes back after a while as a brother.

Shahrazad al-Khalij

- What is the worst feeling in life?

- That you need me and find me, and that when I need you but don’t find you.

Life doesn’t give us everything, and you are everything. That is why life didn’t give you to me.

And tomorrow I’ll travel from your life, like I arrived someday like a stranger.

Inside everyone of us, a trace of someone who will never come back.

Some excuses don’t even deserve to be heard.

 Three things I missed before you : Love, longing and jealousy.
Three things I missed with you : Safety, peace of mind and deep sleep.
Three things I missed after you : Joy, health and feeling alive.

It’s surprising that they wishe to you a happy life, that very person who stopped giving it to you.

Tell me, why did you chose me?
And took me with your hands from all the people, and walked with me, and walked, then left me.

I believed your lie because it was beautiful, and because I heard it with your voice.

How difficult it is, to wait something that has decided to never come back.

Because each one of them is waiting for the other, they will never meet.

Disappointment always comes from the people to who we gave everything.

Don’t blame someone for not asking about you, but blame yourself for thinking about them.

Don’t be sad for losing something, because the sadness may have been greater if you still had it.

We lose everything for them, then lose them.

Don’t trust the beginnings, truth is told in the last moments.

What if I receive a message from that absent one, where they tell me only one thing : “I miss you”.

Immortal things aren’t the things that never die, but the things that are never forgotten.

A stranger, I was with you,
A stranger, I was without you,
And a stranger, I’ll always be.

If you don’t venture for something you love, be quite when you lose it.

When will you come? There a lot of stories that can only be told to you.

She didn’t come. I said : And she won’t. So, I’ll rearrenge the afternoon with what suits my deception and her absence.

Don’t fight the world for soemone who can’t fight their ego for you.

I failed at everything with you, even at hating you.

he honest doens’t swear.
The confident doesn’t make excuses.
The faithful doesn’t regret.
The generous doesn’t count.
And the lover doesn’t get borred.

The memories that don’t die, kill.

There’s no news except that I miss you.

Before I’ve met you, I was wishing to meet you.
And after meeting you, I was wishing to never be separated from you.
And after being separated from you, I lost the desire to wish for ever.

Do the absent ones know the taste of waiting?

How many questions lost their sheen, when we found answers to them?

Who claims that he forgot, dies every night and never forgets.

Life has an expiration date, and love has an expiration date, and dreams have an expiration date, and happiness has an expiration date, and patience has an expiration date, and everything has its end.

A lot of love can lose two people, one not talking and the other not understanding.

Only when they leave, we realize how little was the time we spent with them, and no matter how the time was long, it wasn’t enough, and it didn’t satiate our desire in their closeness.

It happens that he gets on the computer just to breathe your presence from the “Online” on the chat, and leaves.

Sometimes, I think about telling you “Good morning”, then I remember that there’s no good or mornings between us.

Every face that I see hurts me, because it’s not yours.

I am here and you are there; when will the “t" drop? 

How many friendships meant love, but they didn’t see it?
And how many “How are you?” meant “I miss you”, but they didn’t get it?

"Sometimes, saying “Goodbye” is like saying “Let’s stop hurting each other”."

"You lose yourself trying to hold on to someone who doesn’t care about losing you."

"You say you love me, but I know 20 years from now you won’t be able to remember my name."

"Sometimes the night shines brighter than the day"

"I will always love the false image I had of you."
"Tomorrow could be the someday you’ve been waiting for."
"The eyes see only what the mind is prepared to comprehend."

She is a paradox. She is faithful and yet detatched. She is commited and yet relaxed. She loves everyone, and yet no one. She is sociable but also a loner. She is gentle and yet tough. She is passionate but can also be platonic. In short, she is predictable in her unpredictability…"

"You killed something in me, that I’ll forever miss."

sometimes i just want to text
people who have faded out of my life and ask them why. why did you drift away? but then i realize that probably wouldn’t be the wisest thing to do.

"Birth is not the beginning, 
Death is not the end."

"Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple."

You may be the answer to someone’s prayer.

Don’t shed tears for someone who hurt you. Don’t long for that person if they left. Don’t feel sorry if you failed when you tried your best..

Missing you comes in waves.

Tonight I’m drowning.

I don’t sleep to dream" she said, " I sleep to forget you.

Shut up, the wound you gave me is enough.

Create a conversation with me, I may be not okay.

I spent a lot of days thinking that I lost you but I knew deep down that I haven’t. You are just lying underneath my heartbeats, keeping me company throughout those evenings when breaking down is the only choice I have. The thing is, I didn’t have the strength to pick you up and to build decent sentences and paragraphs with them. I just left you floating inside my head as I tried to sleep my loud thoughts off. But right now, I can slowly find my way back to you. One of these days, my hands won’t be shaky enough to hold them and my eyes won’t be blurry of tears to see right through you. I’ll find my way back to my words and I’ll never lose youagain. 

“alcohol makes you feel the way you should feel without alcohol”

i.It reminds me of separation. It was raining when my best friend told me she would rather not spend time with me anymore because of all the mistakes I committed. I could not blame her. I was a mess but hearing those words from her lips while the sound of the rain shouted just sent my body on fire. I ran my way home crying.
ii. It reminds me of goodbyes. It was raining hard when my mother embraced me for the last time tied with a promise that she would be back any time soon. Three years later and I could still feel my entire body ache with her absence. She’s gone and it has been raining everyday inside me ever since.
iii.It reminds me of my first chance in love. It was raining when I first met the boy with hazel eyes. He held my hand and I felt a lightning struck straight to my heart. It was raining when I called him mine. It was raining when he gave me goodbye.
iv.Now, all that rain ever reminds me is how cold my heart is and how I am perfectly okay with that since I have accepted that my sun is not my sun and I am nothing but a tiny droplet that would always cease to evaporate in the atmosphere.

You can’t keep on chaining me on your shadows while running away. If you must leave, then take everything that you gave me. Go to a place where I could no longer hear your voice echoing. Leave me with nothing. Leave me at peace. 

“I wonder if you know yet that you’ll leave me. That you are a child playing with matches and I have a paper body. You will meet a girl with a softer voice and stronger arms and she will not have violent secrets or an affection for red wine or eyes that never stay dry. You will fall into her bed and I’ll go back to spending Friday nights with boys who never learn my last name. I have chased off every fool who has tried to sleep beside me. You think it’s romantic to fuck the girl who writes poems about you. You think I’ll understand your sadness because I live inside my own. But I will show up at your door at 2 am, wild-eyed and sleepless. and try and find some semblance of peace in your breastbone. and you will not let me in. You will tell me to go home.”

 When we first met, you asked me to tell you about myself and so I did. I told you I was a poet and you smiled like you knew one day you’d be all I could write about. 

 I’ve learned to breath without you but it’s never stopped hurting and I’ve never stopped loving you, how could I? And yes, perhaps I’ve forgotten the color of the sky that first night you told me you loved me but somewhere, your voice still echos, I don’t really recognize it anymore and that should scare me, shouldn’t it? 

The drugs aren’t strong enough,
I can still remember you. 

Fuck.

 I hope she makes you happy. When you laugh I hope it makes her smile because for fucksake who couldn’t smile after hearing that? When your bodies are pressed together I hope she realizes how lucky she is to be that close to you. I hope she treats you better then your first love because you deserved way better then her. I hope she enjoys how excited you get when you talk about something you enjoy; it’s so adorable. But mostly I hope see teaches you how to love yourself, just as much as I love you. 

 If you live off a man’s compliments, you’ll die from his criticism. 

 I remember crying over you and I don’t mean a couple of tears and I’m blue. I’m talking about collapsing and screaming at the moon. 

If someone cheats on you they do not love you, remember that. If someone cheats on you they do not care about you as much as they say they do. If someone cheats on you it means that for a split second you were off their mind long enough for them to put another person in arms that should only be for you. If someone cheats on you, dear god, I hope you don’t go back to them because you are worth so much more than that.

 Our relationship wasn’t the sun, the moon, and the stars, but it wasn’t bullshit, either. 

 One day I just woke up and realized that I can’t touch yesterday. So why the heck was I letting it touch me? 

 you might call me a hypocrite 
for not taking my own advice.
but really,
im just trying to save you 
from the habits that i cannot stop. 

wow i need a drink [pours apple juice into shot glass]

There’s no point in speaking when no one is listening. Let silence do all the talking

sometimes i fantasize about my biggest fears and you still think it’s a compliment that i dream about you

 "You will find someone else" but I don’t want someone else. All I ever wanted and all I ever needed was him. Don’t say I will find someone else when I found what I wanted. 

I barely find anybody attractive. I barely feel an affection for anybody.. But when I do.. I fall in so deep, so hard it’s ridiculous. 

My parents are lucky I was too lazy to go through a rebellious phase

 He will kiss you
and mumble softly
into your ear and
you will think that
this is what love is like. 
It’s not going to be that
you won’t feel anything
as he puts his hands on you
but does his touch really
warm your heart or does
he simply set it on fire?
And does the silence
echoing through the room
really feel comfortable
or is it smothering you with
the weight of words unspoken?
You should know better than
to think that forgotten calls and
unanswered text messages
are a synonym for love.
It’s not easy but once
you realize that the butterflies
aren’t there and you’re
not sure whether he likes
your soul or just your skin,
do yourself a favor and

decide if you really need him. 

If you don’t love yourself, you’ll always be chasing people who don’t love you.

 

1. Do not date a boy who does not care what your favourite song is. The boy who does not care what melodies ignite your heart strings with love and wonder while staring at passing street lights on the last train home, will not care if it’s 2 a.m. and your heart is breaking.

2. Do not let anyone fold you up like last winters tattered scarf and put you away with the others in a neatly labeled box. Even when there’s thunder and the sky is crying, you are your mum’s favourite summer dress. You are to wear yourself like you believe it.

3. We are all stories. Write yours how you want. Make today’s chapter about purposely taking the wrong bus and discovering a tiny blue tea shop, or folding origami paper hearts over and over on your window sill. Just make sure it’s something you’d enjoy reading.

4. I will always try to save you.

5. Someday you will be 19 and lost and heartbroken and you will think about a place you’ve seen on TV or heard or read about in a book or seen a picture of. You will feel your heart drop into your stomach. Go there. For a day, a month, forever, but it’s important that you go.

6. The world is so beautiful. Do not let the slumped over homeless man outside the convenience store or the stories of guns and bombs on the television let you believe otherwise. We are all so lost. All of us. We all show it in different ways. I write bad poems. Others start wars. There is no inherent evil, only good people searching too hard.

7. I love everything about you.

8. Money turns people into liars and emotional ghosts. School grades are an inaccurate representation of you. Measure your life’s worth in how many times you’ve nearly lost your life to laughter, how many books you’ve closed with happy tears in your eyes, people whose lives you’ve brought joy to, marshmallows eaten, or countries visited.

9. Don’t ever let anyone tell you to stop crying. Cry if you want to. It’s okay. You’re allowed.

10. My best friend once told me that the most important decision he had ever made was to love everyone and everything. He’s the only person I’ve ever known to have a viewable aura of light around him. Don’t forget to love this world, to love people. Be light. You are already mine.

It hurts.
It hurts a lot.

But I’ll keep it to myself so it doesn’t hurt anyone else 

 He was pointing at the moon, but I was looking at his hand. 

Life is so hard when your best friend is a 9.5/10 and you’re a strong 4 with the right filter and lighting

Yeah, I know a lot about people who aren't smart enough to want to love someone back. But I can tell you one secret - in general, they aren't worth to love them at all. 

 The hardest part of walking away is accepting that your love isn’t enough to inspire change. Then one day you realize you were fighting to love someone more than you fought to love yourself. 

 I’m homesick for arms that don’t want to hold me. 

 It was wrong of 
me 
to love
you. 

I am so sorry, darling. 

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions

 Ever since we started talking again I’ve kept my feelings for you distant from myself, I still liked you god do I like you but I tried not to because I didn’t want to get hurt. But now I just feel like they’re all coming back, and I don’t know how to handle it because it kinda really hurts, remembering all the shitty things you did but still having strong feeling for you is awful. Because I don’t know what to do about them, it’s like I want to stop thinking about you, but I also want to hug you and not let you go. And fuck it’s confusing. 

Would this even make sense to you? I love you. (

 When I love you, 
I really fucking love you. 
There are no in betweens.
I don’t know what grey is.

My love is black and white. 

"I’ve made a home out of your arms, and it’s terrifying knowing that one day, I may not be able to come home again."

"I am a victim of loving more than I should and falling harder than I should."

"It’s silly to think that just one little text, or just one small phone call from you can brighten up even my worst day.

"I’d rather fall asleep listening to your heartbeat instead of the rain."

"I woke up wanting your 
lips on mine. 
I woke up wanting your 
arms around my waist. 
I woke up wanting our 
hands laced together.
I woke up wanting to 
gaze in your eyes.
I woke up 

wanting you."

 

dogs are always so happy to be alive i stive to have the positivity of a dog

 I don’t know if I can do this anymore, I miss you so fucking much I want to be yours but you left me in the middle of the fucking road to get hit by a car while you drove off with her laughing about the tears on my face. 

 

1) When you told me you still had feelings for her, I felt my body just collapse. I would say my heart, but my whole body physically ached.

2) I haven’t slept well in weeks. I wake up around 4am almost every night crying my eyes out because you still think you’re allowed to show up in my dreams.

3) You said you weren’t just going to “throw me away” so why am I alone choking on my own feelings?

4) You told me I was more then enough for you. WHY ARENT YOU STILL HERE THEN??

5) You make me feel everything and nothing all at once. I didn’t know that was possible, but then again I didn’t know it was possible for someone as sweet as you to spit so many lies at me.

6) Do I know all the words you say to her? I hope they give her butterflies and make her feel just as special because she will have them taken back just as fast as they were given to her.

7) You made me so happy in that short period we spent together and I’m sorry I couldn’t do the same.

8) I can’t even wear my favorite sweats or tshirt because that was the outfit I wore when you came over. I’m scared that they might smell like you still.

9) I don’t know why I gained feelings this fast for you. You have so much power over my feelings. How do you do it?

10) I miss you so fucking much.

This is a confession: I didn’t really want to go to your birthday party.

I know that the summer sun treats you well but short sleeves and I don’t usually like each other and besides you’re always the most important person at every event and always talking to a million other people besides me and I just have to stand there and force a smile while patiently waiting the appropriate amount of time before I can make an excuse and leave so instead of being as pumped up as you were I kind of just sighed and steeled myself for another loud and awkward night

but it turned out to be pretty quiet and you and I got nicely tipsy without anyone trying to get us to chug things and we sat on your swingset and talked about the good times and you leaned your head on my shoulder and said “Thank god you came. I love everyone but they wear me out. You’re my only real friend, you know?” and I think those words got me higher than any drug ever could because I couldn’t stop smiling after.

This is a confession: I think that was the night I started to fall in love.

This is a confession: The times when I turned you down and told you I was too tired to go to the movies were usually because I’d been up all night trying to figure out what the fuck was going on in my heart because more and more often I’d find myself stuck on the idea of you as if you were a thorn except the pain was kind of good but at the same time laced with guilt I mean you were my friend and if this was just some dumb crush I could get over it and it wouldn’t even effect what we had but god forbid it got bigger inside of my chest because if it did then I was really in for trouble since that meant I could actually mess things up between us so yes every time you asked me “do you wanna hang today” the answer was always “absolutely” but half the time I had to be like “no say no give yourself time to get over this” it never really worked but I felt like a better friend.

This is a confession: I drop everything I’m supposed to hold onto tight but for some reason no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t lose my grip on you.

By the time we’d spent a year just being best friends I had figured out that maybe I just felt deeper about you than anyone else only because you were the sun to me, you were the reason that I’d be happy, you were what I was looking forwards to no matter what else I had that day so I just assumed maybe that’s what close friends do but

one day you left on vacation and for a solid two weeks I didn’t hear from you because neither of us could afford the roaming charges and those two weeks basically defined everything for me because I’d missed people before but this was nothing like that, this was as if I was missing my other half and when you came back the first and only thing I wanted was to kiss you like crazy and while we were hugging I realized just how fucked I was because my only thought was to say “I missed you, my love” and good god but in that moment did I wish we were something more than just being good friends and

This is a confession: I don’t hug you anymore because I think it’s unfair to you because it means so much more to me. I don’t jokingly say “I love you babe” because I’m afraid my voice will crack and when the words hit the air they will ring with truth. I don’t say stuff like “honey” or “sweetheart” or “darling” around you because you’ve always been able to read me like a book and maybe one of these pet names will actually show you what you mean to me.

This is a confession: I didn’t even want to go to your birthday party. I didn’t want to fall in love with you. I didn’t want to fuck this up because it’s the most important thing in my life and when I inevitably ruin it with my stupid heart and stupid crush and stupid need for you, it’s gonna break me. And last night when we were both drunk and laughing and you were lying beside me I was so close to telling you the truth that I started shaking and when later you whispered “confess something” I almost snapped like a twig into tiny pieces and instead just started laughing and made up something like “I failed my last test” but

This is my confession: I’m never gonna tell you any of this.

 Memories, you see, hurt. The good ones most of all. 

And now I simply remember you as a person I gave my soul to.
A person I told secrets to at 4am and fucked to feel a sense of closeness.
A person I loved, yes.
But it is not six months ago.
It is now, and now I miss you.
I miss the way you called randomly just to ask how my day was.
I miss the way you seemed to care, even if you didn’t.
I miss the friendship and the secrets and the stories.
And maybe one day things will be different.
Maybe you’ll call me on a Tuesday afternoon and ask how my day was.
These are the things I think about before my eyes slowly close and I am finally rewarded with sleep.
But for right now?
Go fuck yourself.

Tonight I listened to a voicemail you left me three months ago.
In it, you told me to go fuck myself.
I still remember that night.
I still remember those words rolling off your tongue so gracefully.
I remember wondering how someone so beautiful could be so cruel.

Two months ago I called you at three A.M.
I expected you to ignore it, or to send me to voicemail;
those were two of the things you were best at.
You answered and I felt my heart begin to race;
you probably thought it was because I missed you,
but truthfully it was because I didn’t expect you to answer,
and because I really had to pee.
I asked you how you were and you sat there quietly and confused.
It was like you forgot that I existed and that I was once a part of your life.
You told me “fine” and I smiled.
That was the last conversation we had.
I made sure to let go of you, and every negative word that was said, in a peaceful way.

Fast forward two months, and I still wonder how you are.
I still wonder how your dog is and if you’ve seen any good movies lately.
If you ever heard me say this, you’d probably blush like you used to whenever I said something sweet.
You’d probably think I think these things because I still love you, that I still want you.
But that is not the case.
You see, six months ago I was jumping through hoops to please you.
To make sure that you were happy before myself.
To make sure that I was the one causing your happiness.
But it is not six months ago.

 I hope she kisses you goodnight, not just once but twice. I hope she figures out everything about you and all the soft spots on your beautiful body.I hope she loves you enough that you won’t let her go, like you let me go. I’m sorry I couldn’t love you. 

alcohol is not the answer

alcohol is the question, yes is the answer

. He was the first to hold my waist and tell me I was beautiful, he looked at me like I was the world, but I wasn’t, I was a game for him and he got bored after a few turns
2. He couldn’t handle my fire, he wanted me, but not the me who yelled and spoke her mind, he wanted the one who put her hands in her lap and kept her mouth shut, she was never real and neither was our love
3. He smiled and blushed when I said his name, he held me tight when I cried, he always called me back, and he smelled like strawberries, but for the life of me I couldn’t fall for him
4. He was the first I found that could keep up with me, we spoke in a language no one but us could understand, fast tongues and quick wit, but you can only fight fire with fire for so long before you get ashes, our dalliance burned to the ground and so did we
5. He was exciting and good hearted, he needed me, he cared for me, he told me everything would be okay even when I knew it wouldn’t be, his smile lit up rooms, he was the one that got away'

why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone 

I just want to go to bed but preferably with you

are u in love with me? no?? *slides u a chocolate pudding* how about now?



Your lips are like wine and im an alcoholic.
Your skin is like fire an im a pyromaniac.
Your words are like a symphony and im a musician.
Everything you are is everything i adore.
Im crazy about you.
Im also half asleep and writing in the dark. 
Goodnigh







I’m the jealous type. You wanna know why? Because we started off as ‘just friends’ too.

You wanted sex. I wanted you.



"   No matter where I am, I am always loving you.   " 















"   Of course it’s complicated. If it wasn’t, I probably wouldn’t be interested in you.   " 





Your lips were filled with sweet kisses and promises you had no intention of keeping

 One day, 

Our goodbyes
Will turn into
Sleepy goodnights
Escaping our tired lips.

Our can I call you’s?
Will turn into
Come here and hold me’s.

Our things
Won’t be
mine or
yours anymore.

One day,
I’ll scream in the middle of the night,
And you
Will pull me close;
tell me everything’s alright
And I’ll fall asleep.
Safe.

One day,
You’ll come home
And tell me we need to get groceries,
We’ll make a list, and tape it to the fridge
But tomorrow we’ll forget it there
And you’ll blame me,
And I’ll blame you
And we’ll spend a hundred because
We couldn’t remember.
And were both too damn impulsive.

One day,
You’ll understand every aspect
Of my condition
But love me all the more.
And I’ll treasure you,
Hold your hand everytime it gets bad
Knowing I am okay,
With you.

One day,
I’ll wake up in the morning,
To the smell of cooking,
I’ll come down the stairs
Of a house we call ours,
And I’ll kiss the love of my life
Good morning
As well as goodnight.

Never push a loyal person to the point where they no longer care.

I am attracted to the idea
of your lips
exploring my body
as if it were a map
and you kept getting lost
on purpose.

When i saw you for the first time, my eyes were thanking me for letting them gaze upon something so stunning.
Your name is a luxury to have rolling off my tongue.
Your arms are the fire that keeps me going, even on the darkest of nights.
Your smile shines so bright, i am convinced there has been a never ending sunrise since we first spoke.
You have a laugh that pierces every single demon in my heart and blossoms beautiful flowers across my fragile chest.
When our fingers intertwine, the world is our canvas, every moment painting something unfathomably picturesque.
Being by your side makes the butterflies in my stomach flutter rapidly.
I hope those butterflies never die.

Realizing that waiting for that special person isn’t worth it anymore because as your waiting for them, they too wait for someone. Someone else.

You gave me a galaxy when I needed a star.

I use humor to cover up the fact that I want to jump off a bridge