Just when I thought there’d be someone that wasn’t you,
I’m reminded of why there could never be anyone else. 


How cruel of you
To leave me all alone
For the dreams that have me in them. 

We can share a thousand sunsets
But I’ll always be gone by sunrise.
I don’t like who I am when morning breaks. 

One day, someone will break my heart so bad I’ll finally stop thinking of you. 
But Not Today (32/?)

I’m sorry our love left quietly,
Like the soft sprinkling
Of rain in April.
I’m sorry I didn’t sob the way I should have,
That we didn’t yell the way we did when we loved each other,
That our fireworks fizzled to sparkles.
When I loved you, it was loud,
Feeling my heart
Throw itself against my ribcage,
Trying to escape from me
So it could be carried in you.
But it got weaker,
The thuds got softer,
Until all that was left
Was the pitter patter of rain. 


One day I’ll write about someone without thinking of you first. 

You told me you would be
The greatest love of my life,
But your eyes aren’t brown,
Like 7:00 AM coffee,
And your hair isn’t black,
Like ink all over my paper.
You’re green like spring
And you change with the seasons.

So do I.

The thought of how I loved you
Fills my lungs with ash.
I think I’m learning 
To breathe again. 

I know that I promised
To carry the weight of your memory,
But I’ve met someone
That wants to shoulder some of my burden.
I see you
In the way they ash their cigarettes
And in the curve of their lips
When I reach for their hand.
I’ve got a heavy heart
That’s full of you 
But I think I can become strong enough
To carry you both. 

They say you pick up traits
From all your ex-lovers.
I wonder if you know who I’m talking about
When I say “I dated someone.” 

I’m gonna stop answering your calls until I’m ready. I hope you don’t answer mine either. 

I gave you love. I gave you time. I gave you my dignity. All of it was yours and you’re still asking for more. I have nothing left to offer. I don’t want to give you anything else. 

Maybe you’re right. Maybe you could be a better person with me.

But did you ever think that I would be a terrible person with you?I Didn’t Like Who I Was With You

I tried so hard to make you love me. Why do you always wait until it’s too fucking late? 

I know it makes you sick to your stomach to think that I’m touching them instead of you but you know better than anyone that I can’t keep my hands off anything that’ll hurt me. 

I used my love to build you a home. It’s as vacant as it’s always been. 

And how ironic is it that you didn’t start chasing me until I wanted you to stop? 

Even after all this time, you haven’t realized it: you don’t want to love me. You just want me to love you. 

The real tragedy is that I’ll love you more than anyone but only as long as the next person. 

I am not the moon. I can’t shine through your black nights but my dark looks a lot like yours and maybe that’s enough. 

I can’t sleep. I must be afraid of dreaming of you again. 

Don’t come home anymore. I’ve waited for you too long. You won’t find me there. 

I don’t want you to come first for me anymore but I’m so used to second place that I’m not sure how to move myself up in my own life anymore. 

I’ve got half written books
And unfinished paintings
And friendships I never got around to fixing.
I’m terrified that you’ll end up
As another thing I never went through with."

— Fear of Commitmen